Books for Breakfast - Book Reviews With a Twist

And, along comes real life...

2012-01-18T15:31:00.001-07:00

Stay tuned... books are being read for future reviews. Posting to resume in February.

Thanks!

Ode to my 600th Post

2011-12-12T17:42:00.002-07:00

Cunning blog, bowl
for my thoughts and musk melon,
as well as rotten plums
and filmy kiwi. I would splatter
the walls with seeds,
slippery pith and flesh alike
melding into one stinky Monet,
but at least not a page was torn.

There have been clunkers, thrown books, and those XX given uppers. Thank you for sticking through them all with me!

P.S. I have been reading like mad, so there will be a sudden plethora of reviews. Many new ones to look forward to in 2012, everyone. Are you one of them? Let me know.

It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer. ~ Albert Einstein

2011-11-18T09:15:00.001-07:00

-X

I do this every year. Then, I am shocked and bewildered into tears when I fail... every damn year. Future Kristin, future participants, here is why NaNoWriMo may not be the best option for you.

Unless you are already writing, sitting in front of a computer or notebook for hours every day will give you the willies. You will begin talking to plants, dogs, or that fuzzy google-eyed end of your eraser. If you hate cats, you may find yourself outside talking to them, changing your voice inflection. "Hell-oh, ki-ttens." Suddenly, you have lost yourself, loving kittens, wanting to write about your newfound feeling for ki-tten rights. Then, when there are peers around, you get busted talking to plants, dogs, or that fuzzy google-eyed end of your eraser... or, the ki-ttens. There is no "method writing" excuse for us.

If you are writing, fantastic. Keep it up. You have a set schedule. You are, as I tell other writers, doing the main thing: keeping your ass in the chair. This is the hardest part of being a writer, especially when one wants to flit over to the coffee shop ("I'm a WRITER!") or a reading at a local college ("I'm a WRITER!) or just leave snarky messages about other books on BN.com or Amazon ("I'm a WRITER who goes by A1Author69!").

But, if you are writing, the email to join NaNoWriMo is like a siren's call: finish a book in a month. Dreams begin to fast-forward on the mental loop. This baby could be sold by Valentine's Day. My tour could fit with my summer sabbatical. And, the insanity begins.

What have you completed to perfection in one month's time? I figured out how to combine the ingredients for Dodge's cocoa, but I have not been able to make it perfectly since. I have written beautiful sentences that I re-read to remind me to keep writing, but there are also some clunkers to steer me toward a career in dog or ki-tten grooming.

Writing takes time. Writing takes a personal rhythm. Only you know the beat of the week, the earworm of the month. Guilt produces nothing but empty pages. Remember this.

XX. TO THE END OF THE LAND ~ David Grossman

2011-11-18T09:05:00.001-07:00

Perhaps this is the first lyric novel, where every feeling and emotion of each character is expressed, analyzed, re-evaluated, and turned over again for moldy remnants. Or, perhaps, it is a metaphor for modern society's desire for analysis. My need to understand why I did not connect with this award-winning novel is an example.

I left it at page 186. I liked the roundness of those numbers, and I knew I cared about the characters. Just not enough to slump along with them for another 437 pages.

8. 10 MINDFUL MINUTES ~ Goldie Hawn

2011-11-15T13:46:00.001-07:00

10 Mindful Minutes: Giving Our Children--and Ourselves--the Social and Emotional Skills to Reduce Stress and Anxiety for Healthier, Happy Lives

I can hear many of your thoughts. What. The. ? Why is she reviewing a self-help? For kids? Parents?

It is so simple. Otherwise, you may end up reducing your stress with a cocktail instead of - I don't know - playing Goth Barbies for the millionth time.

Actually, my sister showed me the book while we were, um, "visiting" at another relative's house (trying to protect the innocent here). With all of my imbibing, I finished reading it during trips to the loo.

I despise stars using ghost writers to push personal agendas, but this seems to have Goldie Hawn's sticky sweetness all over it. Is it the new wave of parenting or psychology? No, but it is a smart way to provide kids with the language to express their feelings. Eventually, it will help both the parent and child develop strategies to deal with those feelings in a zen-Buddhist reminiscent manner.

There are many other books that will help those with teens or to assist in the understanding of human brain development (as in, teenagers do not have functioning pre-frontal cortexes, so they just cannot help text-driving). This book lands on this like a butterfly sipping nectar but prefers to spread its showy wings to spread calm and beauty.

Hey, it might work.

3.5 out of 5.0 Healthy 2% Milks.

Flippin' Freebies - Flash It

2011-11-14T12:33:00.001-07:00

Congratulations to Sandy M., who will be receiving a free book for her beautiful prose about autumn:

"... moldy cedar similes/sweep the leaves past/the memories of death."

*sniffle* After a brief pause for a cough-ffee break, I would like to announce the Flippin' Freebies event for November/December.

Visit the Facebook Books for Breakfast page or email booksforbreakfastblog at gmail with your mini-bits about the upcoming holidays. Keep it flash, y'all, at under 200 words.

Two winners will receive free books for the new year. Or the last year, according to the Mayan calendar and Nostradamus. Either/or, let's not quibble unless it is over something important, like comma splices or how Twilight is Twideath. Oh, I can feel a a reader's mail post coming soon...

Deadline: December 20, 2011. Because this is a tax write-off for me, so let's get crackin'.

And, yes, I am tweeting now. Blogger did not allow me to use my preferred language for it.

7. THE MATCHMAKER OF KENMARE ~ Frank Delaney

2011-11-09T12:46:00.000-07:00

The Matchmaker of Kenmare: A Novel of Ireland

A toast to excellent publicists because Frank Delaney has become one of my new favorites. His dedication to Irish history and the descriptions of its scenery are akin to Maeve Binchy's use of Ireland as a backdrop in her romance writing. The difference is Frank Delaney's epic plotting.

In this wonder, the focus in upon Kate Begley, the local matchmaker. Ben McCarthy, who is gathering stories for the Irish Folklore Commission, finds her and observes Kate using a mix of compliments, style tips, and scolding to set up the right couples.

Unknown to Kate at the time, her biggest challenge is yet to come: finding Ben's missing wife, as well as her own love story.

Set during World War II, the author is smart enough to stay away from too much about the war (been there, done that). However, each tangled knot is unraveled long enough to reach the next plot point with many surprises and some reliefs. Reading this reminded me of "frogging" a poorly crocheted hat with all of its snags, and how wondrous one thread can hold it all together beautifully.

4.0 out of 5.0 Dodge Cocoas.

Dodge Cocoa: Make your favorite hot chocolate with milk. Then, use whipped cream vodka instead of peppermind schnaaps. On second thought, use both. Garnish with shaved chocolate and peppermint.

"Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital." ~Aaron Levenstein

2011-11-08T09:35:00.002-07:00

I hit 300,000 unique viewers sometime over the weekend. I allowed myself some time to imagine why... the changes to the blog, my new goals to read 300-350 books in a year.

I told myself I could grow up to just drink and read books!

After pouring a celebratory shot of Bailey's and Godiva into my coffee, I looked at the stats.

Okay, who is doing a project on Number the Stars by Lois Lowry? First, students, you never, ever, use a blog as an informational source. Especially a blog by a delusional drunkard wannabe. Second, if you are semi-smart enough to quote from the blog, your teacher will put it into the google machine and find THIS. I am a quasi-English professor, so I know. Last of all, if you do quote this blog and cite it, no instructor would believe it as a reliable resource. See also: Wikipedia, Sparknotes, Yahoo Questions.

Teachers? Do not assign this book at the same time.

It is almost noon. Time to switch to vodka sevens and never trust the stat spikes again.

6. HOW TO BE A MOVIE STAR ~ William J. Mann

2011-11-05T09:16:00.000-06:00

How to Be a Movie Star: Elizabeth Taylor in Hollywood

Sidenote: I adore my nook, and I love my library. Otherwise, I would be pretty ticked off about the deals going on at the bookstores regarding recent reads.

After reading Cleopatra, it only made sense to look at America's closest woman. Elizabeth Taylor even played the part, though I doubt the real Cleo was as voluptuous.

While this isn't the typical biography of Elizabeth Taylor (it covers her golden years in Hollywood - that's it), it does show how the public relations and marketing machines cranked out stars during that era. It also demonstrates why so many of them crashed or have caught the attention bug fiercely enough to tap-dance on Jenny Craig commercials today.

Mann sets up each chapter as an example of how to handle a situation in Hollywood to one's advantage. His point is to argue there will never be another movie star, throwing all of the Jennifer Anistons and Angelina Jolies back into the ocean.

I like how he used new information previously unreleased, including some of Elizabeth Taylor's handwritten records, but his sources tell the stories. Elizabeth Taylor is too big of a star, even posthumously, to let someone else write for her in this book, and her voice is the strongest. It convinced me to start with Blue Velvet and rediscover her work.

3.0 out of 5.0 Creme de Violettes.

5. CLEOPATRA: A LIFE ~ Stacy Schiff

2011-11-03T08:36:00.000-06:00

No, she did not dissolve a pearl in wine,
but, damn, what a great story!

Cleopatra: A Life

Do you know what I hate? Reading a fantastic book with nothing to show for it. While I adore my nook and dig the library system, my husband build a custom library for me. I can sit and look at my books in the winter sun with huge, fluffy white dogs purring and snoring around me, candles lit to mask their odorous farts.

It is my heaven, referring back to The Lovely Bones.

However, the book is on sale, so this is one of my must-buys of the year: Cleopatra: A Life.

Why? Did you think you knew everything about her from Elizabeth Taylor's movie? Or, *shudder*, Shakespeare? From this book alone, you will discover that Shakespeare cribbed most of his words from historians who wrote about Cleopatra 200 years after she died.

And, what about the infamous asp that killed her? I will let you have even more surprises, but there are far too many legends dispelled in this wonderful historical biopic.

Even if you do not have any interest in Cleopatra or are tired of her appeal, it is important to read to understand why people were so ready for the coming of a savior (Jesus Christ) during these tumultous Roman civil wars. It is a time when people were questioned for not being Jewish enough, as Cleopatra was not Egyptian, but Greek. And the roles (i.e., "expected roles") of the Roman women are remarkably similar to Tea Party statements today.

Although the prose is repetitive at times, it is so thick with details, it has to be. Not everyone gets to read a book cover to cover in a few sittings. Fanatic in her meticulous historical comparisons and specificity, Schiff is someone I will refer to in future writing.

4.5 out of 5.0 Cleopatras.

"Writing is an exploration. You start with nothing and learn as you go." E.L. Doctorow

2011-11-02T09:09:00.001-06:00

It is going to be an interesting month. By "interesting," see also: painful, insane, and "mad hatter."

4. THE HOUSE AT RIVERTON ~ Kate Morton

2011-11-01T15:49:00.000-06:00

The House at Riverton: A Novel

Oh, to be Grace Bradley. First, she lives 98 years - imagine the change in daily life. Her grandson is a famous author, but Grace is suddenly thrust into the spotlight because she is the only living reminder of Riverton Manor, as well as what happened there during a summer party.

A film director wants information and "truth" from Grace, and validation that she recreated the scenes correctly. Grace, who had been a maid for the Hartford family, is the only one who knows why the poet was found shot, and why the two Hartford sisters, Emme and Hannah were distraught and separated in their grief. However, Grace shares her memories and observations through tapes to her grandson, to be played only after she passes away.

For those who have read my reviews, you know how this would appeal to me as a lover of historical work. However, the details of servant life in early 1900s Great Britain, especially when tipped against the wealth at Riverton, is confounding and admirable.

I had one moment where I thought, "Grace, why didn't you...?" and readers will know it. But that wasn't the focus of this novel. It is about the beauty and glamour of the Hartford's and their multiple tragedies. Beautifully written, though a big slow toward the end.

4.2 out of 5.0 Fog Cutters.

3. HER FEARFUL SYMMETRY ~ Audrey Niffenegger

2011-10-26T20:00:00.000-06:00

Hmm, who is this? One of the twins?

Her Fearful Symmetry
This book had people scratching their own eyes out or creating alters made from their own ear wax. So, I knew I would either pitch it into the fire or take the Ciroc out of the freezer.

Strangely, I did neither.

How does one describe one of the oddest though fascinating literary experiences? The basic plot involves twin sisters inheriting their aunt's flat in London, on the strict ground that their mother, the aunt's twin, not be allowed there. From there, Elsbeth, the deceased, gains strength in her post-death form, and attempts to communicate with the twins. This book is an example of too much communication can sour a relationship. Go to the nearest pub instead.

However, the descriptions of the after-death experiences were curious and odd enough to make them fresh to my bitter taste buds. Living across from a graveyard did stretch the symmetry of the novel a bit, until I almost felt a bruise on the noggin'. "Do you get it? Don't you get it?" A-ha, graveyard, death, life, symmetry, twins, yes, you have quite a bit going on here that I cannot share without upsetting my readers.

For the win, my favorite character was Martin. Bravo.

2.75 out of 5.0 Peppermint Schnaaps and Cocoas.

2. AUSCHWITZ - Miklos Nyiszli

2011-10-23T07:30:00.000-06:00

Auschwitz: A Doctor's Eyewitness Account
This was one of the most horrible, gritty books that I have read in a long time, not due to the writing style or the subject matter. The title lets anyone over the age of ten know it is not a sunshine and june bug book. AUSCHWITZ. *Shudder.*

But when I read this in the sun with beautiful golden leaves falling from the oak tree above me, the woods around me a cacophony of autumn music, I shivered at the descriptions of men - Jewish men - jumping ahead of others to volunteer to work the ovens. To ignore the faces of their peers, their friends, their family as they took bodies out of the showers then pulled out gold and silver teeth.

Nyiszli, the doctor/author, never explains his purpose in sharing this information. To show the horrible aspects of humanity? To ease some of his own guilt? I call bullshit. So, he drank and smoked a lot to shut out what was going on around him. He did not do enough. Period. He said, "No," instead of trying to help others. Yes, he saved his wife and daughter. Yes, I was not there. Then, enlighten me, tell me of the guilt you feel - or should feel, you snobby prig - every damned day.

2.5 out of 5.0 Smirnoff Lemonade Marmalade Mule.

1. THE LANGUAGE OF FLOWERS ~ Vanessa Diffenbaugh

2011-10-20T12:09:00.001-06:00

Thorns = Go to hell - who knew?

The Language of Flowers: A Novel

Whomever suggested this novel for my first foray into the 2012 challenge deserves a free book, so email me. Not only did I chew off the inside of my lower lip, my eyes were swollen and sore at the end.

As always, I am jumping ahead.

Victoria Jones earned the general last name through the bland child welfare system. She never knew her parents or their circumstances and only remembered disliking touch and her foster families. Until she met Elizabeth, a oak tree against Victoria's hurricanes of hate. Elizabeth began to teach Victoria about the old language of flowers, when gentlemen dared not send red roses to a lady friend.

This is where I will shoot a test tube of some purply vodka mix to avoid giving away the entire story. It is not happily ever after with Elizabeth. And, I wanted to take a horsewhip from my barn to Victoria. The characters behave how they should, however, based on their experiences.

Kudos to a beautiful debut from Vanessa Diffenbaugh, and I look forward to her next work.

4.25 out 5.0 Captain Morgan Silver Sodas.

Challenge: Oct. 5-Nov. 10 2012

2011-10-05T06:00:00.000-06:00

There have been some very insane book projects during my time with Books for Breakfast. Mainly, the first year would be an excellent example of nearly losing my head inside too many pages of divorces and adulterers.

I have spent years devoted to challenged books, banned books, and "top books." Now, I am going to fill in the blanks and look toward the future of literature: post-papel literature. The first embers of a dying publishing industries are beginning to glow, my friends, and we are watching it happen. Therefore, I want to see new means in publishing, PDF files or nook contributions, as well as books.

300 Spartans to battle? Pu-shaw! In the span of 395 days (give or take - my master's is in English, not math), I will read 300 books, occasionally assisted by Books for Breakfast Teen with "sick" milkshake recipes.

In fact, I will not just read 300 books. I will aim for 350 books, and I will finish one novel for online print, as well as write another novel to set free for its unknown purpose.

Crazy? Snarky? You have no idea.

Here's to you, darlin' readers...

What does Kristin Dodge have in common with:

2011-10-01T11:36:00.001-06:00

1. WHEN ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST?
2. I NEVER PROMISED YOU A ROSE GARDEN?
3. THE BELL JAR?

This gives a clue for what she has planned until November 10, 2012. Because, you know, all of her life dreams must be completed before the 2012 apocolypse in December.

Post your ideas in the comment section. Formal announcement to follow next week.

Meanwhile, Kristin is still accepting recommendations for ebooks and paper books, while Ann is accepting advertising space at: booksforbreakfastblog at gmail dot com.

Authors, readers, lend me your ears (eyes)!

2011-09-10T18:56:00.004-06:00

Books for Breakfast - Book Reviews with a Twist, is undergoing a major revamp for an October 1 launch (beta). This is to prepare for the crazy, knock your olive out of the martini announcement on November 10, 2011.

You think you have read snark? Oh, no, my friends.

You think you have read descriptions of books thrown across the room? Well, perhaps that will be limited more...

Because I want new/old/published e-books, ARCs, and suggestions from readers. Loan a .pdf of your book to my nook. Email me about your recent publication. Tell me about the book that held you riveted on the flight home from Japan.

Rules:

1. Email Kristin Dodge at booksforbreakfastblog at gmail dot com.

2. If you spam me, I will hunt you down and kill you by reading Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus using my George W. voice.

3. Know this blog. Know that I do not do interviews unless I am Lady Ga-Ga over an author or book. Know that I like to give away free books to my readers. Know other things about me than I am a reviewer who may or may not read your material based on how well you know this blog persona.

I am not afraid to quiz you over email, either.

4. I do not accept very few things. However, find a similar book that I have read to get a better shot. For example, if you have vampire poetry, you could refer to how much I despise Twilight and it inspired you (see, I also accept flagrant displays of fawning and lying).

5. Consider an ad space. It is cheaper than any other place online, and this blog reaches far fingers. Plus, there is the future fun... erpp, I am dying to tell y'all!

Tell your marketers, tell your moms. Let's do this.

So, cough what's new?

2011-09-07T13:41:00.000-06:00

It is dusty in here. I think someone left a few dirty martini glasses, too... and are those wrinkled knobs olives or cherries? Stinky.

It's about time to make some changes. Check back soon!

9. CHASING ALLIECAT - Rebecca Fjelland Davis

2011-03-27T18:22:00.004-06:00

Sadie, after being pawned off to her aunt and uncle's for the summer, cannot imagine a worse way to spend her time off. Then, she meets Allie, a pierced, spiky haired COW (chica on wheels) who begins training Sadie how to really kick ass when mountain biking.

Then, as a summer schedule develops - with Sadie's crush on new roomie, Joe - the trio takes it off trail and find a priest beaten within a rosary of death. Sadie's life takes an abrupt twist from hero to huntress, as she and Joe begin chasing the secretive Allie around the Minnesota town. Why is Allie afraid? And, who would do this to a priest?

This young adult novel, like Harry Potter, easily tricks readers into thinking they are reading adult fiction. The beautiful imagery and gorgeous language brings my back yard (west side southern MN - legit, yo!) to life.

However, what is best about this novel is the dialogue. These are not your typical teens, but they do not speak like adults. Each brings such unique lingo that one could read the novel and know the character without looking at the tags. Only amazing writing like this could make me want to get off my keister and try biking and chasing AllieCat.

4.75 out of 5.0 Green and Gold Bloodys

8. THE LACUNA - Barbara Kingsolver

2011-02-10T06:03:00.000-07:00

I have been an on-again, off-again fan of Barbara Kingsolver. The Poisonwood Bible showed me a new way to write multiple points of view. However, this book may have turned me off again, like the smell of rancid milk when you are craving cornflakes.

Nana, I know you will ask for a summary of this book. It is next to impossible. In one sentence: a boy grows up learning to cook, and this task brings him into unattainable and unbelievable situations.

Harrison Shepherd tries to remember his exploits through his own writing. His time with Frida Kahlo as her cook in Mexico, the strange legends of the lacuna near his home, the assassination of Trotsky when Shepherd was his secretary, the history of the Incas and the Spaniards and the indiginous tribes...

Stop. I adore history, but this is simply too much. Pack in the communism trials during the Great War, and I can no longer find the beauty in the beginning, the aqua depths of the lacuna with bones, gold, and teeth.

Recommended if flying New York to Australia with multiple layovers.

2.75 out of 5.0 Mexican Prairie Fires.

7. HOTEL ON THE CORNER OF BITTER AND SWEET - Jamie Ford

2011-02-08T12:39:00.001-07:00

On the streets dipping down to the Pacific in Seattle, two friends - a Chinese-American boy named Henry and a Japanese-American girl named Keiko - forged a bond that will last from the bombing of Pearl Harbor to the 1980s.

Due to Henry's father's racism toward all things Japanese, Henry often walked Keiko home to Japantown, a few blocks from his own home in Chinatown. They were the only two Asian faces in school, bright enough to earn scholarships in return for their work during lunch and after school.

Later, Keiko's family is interred in a concentration camp in Idaho, one of the big atrocities of the war. Still, Henry manages to see her and writes letters every week. Eventually, they are unanswered or returned.

As Henry tells this story to his son, Marty, the book takes a new twist. Is this a father-son relationship theme or a gritty look at the dark moments in U.S. history? Or, is the underlying love of jazz a riff to dance no matter what is happening in life? I know the amazing characterization and strong plot made this a fast read for me. When I learn something while in bliss, it is just an added bonus.

3.5 out of 5.0 Bitter Sweets.

5. FINNY - Justin Kramon vs. 6. ONE DAY - David Nicholls

2011-02-05T00:07:00.002-07:00

To our left, relatively new welter weight, FINNY. Sent to me personally by the author, wrapped sentimentally with a brown feather tucked in the ribbon. Sold.

To our right, New York Times best-seller ONE DAY. Given to me for Christmas from my sister, whom I love dearly and hope never reads my blog.

Let the battle begin.

Both stories follow the lifetimes of love interests. In FINNY, the heroine (yes, Finny) and Earl live based on the thread of stolen kisses when Finny was a young teen. Finny goes to college, Earl travels to France. Each maintains contact through letters and short visits to Earl's father.

However, ONE DAY has the unique aspect of looking at one particular day each year in the lives of Emma and Dexter, British chums who cannot decide if they despise or adore each other. I would have kicked Dex to the curb by chapter four, but some girls always like the bad boy.

Ding, ding. The bell rings. A decision must be made. The round goes to FINNY. It's lovely descriptions and elegant prose make this a novel to savor, like the espresso the pair drink in Paris. While I absolutely loved the 1980s flashbacks in ONE DAY - and is a concept many writers are knocking their heads over - it just did not stick with me longer than... one day. Also, purposeful manipulation of my tears makes Beelzebub earn another flogger.

I look forward to reading more from Justin Kramon in the future.

4.0 out of 5.0 Horse Feathers.

2.4 out of 5.0 Night and Days.

4. WORLD WAR Z - Max Brooks

2011-01-15T13:08:00.000-07:00

Oh. I'm. Sorry.

Obviously, "an oral history of the zombie war" is not a book I would typically read. However, my son loved Brooks's other novel, so I thought I would be a responsible parent. Once a year is enough.

In the not-so-distant future, the world goes to war against the living dead. The story is told through the recollections of different people who are being interviewed for posterity.

At first, it was silly fun. Then, I thought, "Wow, I never would have thought of that." Now, I'm buying guns and practicing daily. Kidding!

2.75 out of 5.0 for fun/vacation Zombies who dance on tables.

3. THE AWAKENING - Kate Chopin

2011-01-12T20:53:00.002-07:00

The age-old story of a woman realizing her worth and expressing her freedom from male influence... yet Kate Chopin published this novel in 1899. It was unheard of during the time, making Chopin predictably shunned and disliked.

This is a classic that everyone should read for early feminism. What is fantastic is that Chopin was actually surprised by that perspective.

Oh, the book? Just google the topic... you'll like it. I know you.

4.0 out of 5.0 In the Oceans.

2. A FIERCE RADIANCE - Lauren Belfer

2011-01-03T16:30:00.004-07:00

A murder mystery with a dash of history? I am *in*.

Most people may not want to read about how the little pills stuffed into their mouths originated from a great-great-great-grandparent: a milk jug of mold. During this World War II drama, the government wants the manufacture of penicillin to be so fast that every soldier will have access to it. However, one scientist saw beyond penicillin to the possibilities of other sulfa drugs and paid with her life.

The novel begins like a romance and ends like a romance with a historical mystery in the middle. This quirky organization didn't bother me until I got to the end; then, it was, "We're back to HIM again? What the?"

The radiance began to fizzle at that point, for me. Sorry, Mom!

2.5 out of 5.0 Edward's Purple Medicine.

1. THE HUNGER GAMES SERIES - Suzanne Collins

2011-01-02T14:14:00.001-07:00

Since this is a bit of a cheat-post, it will only count for one title.

Katniss shoots game illegally to help her mother and sister survive, but the true test of her survival skills is in the Hunger Games arena. In futuristic America, there are only twelve "areas" after an uprising against the government. Every year, to remind the citizens of this event, they are forced to watch the games, where only one of 24 will live.

Katniss is one of the the competitors.

This young adult series was compelling on many levels. First, it contained snappy writing. Quick dialogue and lots of action, but it was the attention to details that I enjoyed. Also, it didn't turn all Bella-Edward-Jacob. I don't want to say too much because I want you to read the whole trilogy.

Let's just say that my sister and I were racing each other to finish each book. Who won? Der.

4.25 out of 5.0 Jagerbows

Holidays 2010 - Goal for 2011

2010-12-25T22:17:00.003-07:00

Some emails:

"Where did you go?" "Are you reading anymore?" "Did you finish your book?" "Why don't you post?"

2010 has been a challenging year, so my book reviews (and Books for Breakfast) were swept under the bed to mix with dog hair and dust bunnies. However, how could I completely neglect my baby?

Books for Breakfast is coming back with even more craziness for 2011. But, first, a recap:

2006 - read 150 books in one year

2007 - read 90 of the top 100 books to read, as well as focused on banned books

2008 - read from the 1001 books to read before you die list

2009 - read whatever I wanted

2010 - read recommendations from blog readers

For 2011, I'm expanding upon the idea for 2010. You tell me what to read - email, post here, or send something to the Facebook group. I am only going to read recommendations and Nook books.

Using the "share" option, you can email your library recommendations to me (if you have a nook, too). Or, send an idea to me, and I will put it on my to-do list. However, Nook requests will take priority. ;-)

Goal: 175 books. I will beat my former record with everyone's help.

Cheers! Thanks for sticking with me through the past few months... I am grateful!

24. THE ISLAND - Victoria Hislop

2010-09-02T22:05:00.000-06:00

Spanning four generations in a small Greek village, this book is a fascinating look at guilt, secrets, and isolation.

Alexis, while reflecting on her own path in life, decides to visit her secretive mother's friend, and learns that the beautiful island, Spinalonka, in the distance off of Crete was once a leper colony. Anyone who had signs of the disease, including Alexis's great-grandmother, were immediately shipped off to avoid contaminating others.

The Island shows the devastation of leprosy, but Spinalonka became a place of hope. There was decent housing, medical care, and even a bar for the men.

However, most of the details of this novel take place off "the island" in the village. The stories of Alexis's relatives chase away the more interesting story of the island and its characters. At one point, I became irritated because there seemed to be no emotion shown when one character met the boy who gave her mother leprosy. Really? And, how did they feel about relationships or seeing their "home" across the bay?

These issues are oversimplified, which made me not invested in the characters. What kept me reading were the interesting stories about leprosy and the island, which is based on a historical time in Greece.

2.4 out of 5.0 TKOs.

23. THE THIRTEENTH TALE - Diane Setterfield

2010-08-31T19:15:00.000-06:00

Oh, to have thought of this concept. A biographer meets with the famous author, Vida Winter, to hear her life story, including that of the unwritten "Thirteenth Tale." However, is Margaret going to believe a woman who has told reporters several different stories of her life?

Rather than be misled, Margaret investigates Vida's past. As she peels back the layers, she realizes that truth can be stranger than fiction.

I'll admit it... I thought it would be overrated. However, I was charmed. Though there are enough coincidences to make one's frown begin to pucker, it is still a fascinating story that engrosses the reader.

3.75 out of 5.0 Drinks without a Name.

22. STAR ISLAND - Carl Hiaasen

2010-08-27T18:59:00.002-06:00

Cherry Pye is Hiaasen's latest in a long list of crazy characters. Cherry, formerly Cheryl Bunterman, will remind readers of Britney Spears or Miley Cyrus: spoiled, slutty rock princess. So, being such a hot commodity, is there any wonder that she has a double to cover for her?

No, but Cherry doesn't know (she's too out of it). When her double, Ann, decides to take a vacay and ends up in the Florida swamps with Skink (yes, fans, he is back) and then kidnapped by a raging lunatic-paparazzo, Cherry's mom, manager, and publicists only care enough to keep a lid on the incidents.

As with all of his books, Carl Hiassen is over-the-top in his writing with descriptions that make you cringe or laugh. This look at pop culture is a wicked-fast read.

4.0 out of 5.0 Pop the Cherries.

21. PROMISED LANDS - Jane Rogers

2010-08-11T07:00:00.001-06:00

A novel meticulous in its research about the colonization of Sydney with convicts and their military watchers, including William Dawes, included with the Royal Navy to provide information on the upcoming Halley's comet. Instead, he becomes the primary engineer in building the colony with little wood and a lot of resistance.

Meanwhile, this is a story within a story. The author, Stephen, is writing this book, and jars the reader out of the lovely bubble of early Australia with his notes. It's similar to reading an author's manuscript. At the same time, there are long, strange chapters of his wife, Olla's, thoughts - of Stephen, of their new son (born with cerebral palsy), and of her own delusional beliefs.

Two points of view are interesting: William Dawes and Olla's. They are also parallel. What do you do when you have faith, but those around you do not see your vision? Stephen, however, seems to be the mosquito that finds you after you turn off the lights, whining and buzzing. It's too bad that we couldn't simply find out about him through his novel and Olla's POV.

It's an odd book, and in some ways, I would have preferred to simply read about the convict camp in Australia. However, the author's comparisons and contrasts are brilliant. If you have read it, I'd love to see your opinion about the ending... in the comments, of course.

3.25 out of 5.0 Kangaroos.

"...people like me, who sit in small rooms and type all day, aren't particularly intriguing, even to their own families." - Carl Hiaasen

2010-08-10T14:34:00.006-06:00

This post is for my MFA friends and Terry Davis, author of Mysterious Ways and Vision Quest. During dear Terry's class, I tried to contact Mr. Carl Hiaasen and was cock-blocked by his assistant.

I wouldn't do that to you, Kristin!

Of course, as his "number one fan" a la creepy Annie from Misery, I have read all of his books. I knew why his writing worked and wanted to get in touch with him for an interview to impress my classmates. Cock-blocked. Completely shut down like a closeted lesbian's date on prom.

So, almost ten years later, I really hope that Bridget Fitzgerald happens to google herself and read this silly blog. Bridget sent me an advance copy of Carl Hiaasen's book, Star Island. I receive a lot of books to be reviewed, but when I opened this package, three things may have occurred:

a. Squealing;

b. Jumping up and down;

c. Random calls to people who just did not understand the importance of this event.

Perhaps all three. I am not telling.

Meanwhile, I am going to race-read through this book because I "lurve" Carl Hiaasen. Then, I am going to catch up on the blog with all of the summer reading. There is a pile with "to review" on it. We'll take it slow, shall we?

20. THE SURVIVORS CLUB - Ben Sherwood

2010-06-23T13:32:00.002-06:00

If you want to learn "the secrets and science that could save your life," just turn the pages and enjoy.

Mixed with examples (the Central Park jogger, mountain lion attack survivors, and more) plus scientific research, Sherwood attempts to find the secret to why some people survive and others - don't.

Some of the answers are easy. For instance, you only have a limited time to get out of a downed plane, but you may have been listening to your iPod or playing with your kids during the emergency landing speech. So, you don't know where the nearest exits are located. Would you climb over the seats to get to them?

Other answers are not. U.S. armed forces are asked about survival techniques, and one man says you need a belief in God. What if you lack this? Several of the stories also indicate the arrival of a supreme being who helped or saved them. Does this mean my atheist friends are dead in similar situations?

What makes this book even more fun is the test: there is a link online to determine your own survivor skills and nurture them. Is there one answer? No, but there are several, and I found the entire book motivational and touching, especially when he says that he and his wife named their son, "Will" on purpose.

4.5 out of 5.0 Corpse Reviver>.

19. THE ASH GARDEN - Dennis Bock

2010-06-23T13:19:00.002-06:00

As Emiko draws in mud upon her brother's back, the work of Anton is rushing in a silver bullet down from an airplane toward Hiroshima, about to change the world.

Anton and his colleagues created the atom bomb, stopping World War II. However, when the bomb hit, it not only killed Emiko's friends and family, it severed the emotional tie between Anton and his wife, Sophie.

Nearly fifty years later, after reconstructive surgeries on her burned face, Emiko approaches Anton at a conference where he continues to explain the correctness of this act. She asks to speak with him on tape. Through their discussions, the reader learns far more about the connections between the three characters.

What started as an amazing premise with lyrical prose ended abruptly for me. I will allow you to discover and interpret the final pages for yourself, but it was a book-throwing moment for me. I felt let down, as if so much momentum had been built for... what? Bah.

2.75 out of 5.0 Dirty Pashes.

18. CATHERINE DE MEDICI: RENAISSANCE QUEEN OF FRANCE - Leonie Frieda

2010-06-23T13:05:00.002-06:00

When my friend, Becky, showed me photos of a trip to Italy, I didn't fully understand the role of the Medici family and took her advice on reading material. This lead me to Catherine, who became queen of France and is one of the most fascinating of the Medicis.

Frieda writes non-fiction like fiction, telling history with warmth and deep descriptions. From the flowers in the gardens to the weather, the divine detail made me forget I was reading a biography.

Catherine de Medici was best known for using sorcery, astrology, and necromancy to bring down her enemies and raise her husband, King Henri, and her sons. However, many of the tales about Catherine are tamed in this biography with explanations using her background, health, and examples from the era.

Overall, it was a fascinating look at a powerful woman whom I had only known as Diane de Poitiers enemy in prior books. The drawings of the "real" Diane were enough to satisfy my royal history urges for a few weeks.

4.0 out of 5.0 French Connections.

17. MARY CALLED MAGDALENE - Margaret George

2010-05-20T17:45:00.002-06:00

While the Bible barely mentions Mary Magdalene, the "prostitute" who followed Jesus (there is no evidence that proves that was her profession), there are many churches devoted to her teachings as one of the prophets. She walked with Jesus and earned the title, "Apostle of the Apostles" by seeing visions of his fall and being the first to witness his rising from the dead through her faith.

However, who was Mary? The author uses carefully researched details to piece together a fictional account of a woman. Like Helen of Troy or other mythological women, it is fictional, but she brings much of it to life through Mary's actions.

How is this book different from Margaret George's other books? There is no man involved, other than Jesus. Without a romantic love conflict, there is no source of weakness for her main character, which I found absolutely refreshing. I've read several of George's books, and my main complaint has been that each character could be substituted for each other: Cleopatra for Helen for Mary of Scots. This Mary is bold when she should be floored with self-pity. This Mary leads rather than follows.

I liked the change in characterization, just as I liked the new approach of characterizing Jesus. He is not romanticized. In fact, he seems to go mad at times. Wouldn't you? It seemed to be a modern, realistic way of looking at how the Romans ruled, as well as how people treat one another.

Whether you are Christian or not, it is a fascinating look at a character in history, and I am not referring to the one who will judge the living and the dead.

4.0 out of 5.0 Simple Mary.

Comments from readers

2010-05-20T17:35:00.002-06:00

"If u r goin to rite a blog, rite a blog."

"Are you OK? Because I already mailed the ARC." (You know who you are... this made me laugh. Writers are so cheap! We covet our measly allowance of books for personal marketing purposes. What, you think the publishers just give these books away like hot cakes? Please.)

"I never received my book, and you have not updated your Facebook group. Is this for real?"

"Why do you ignore me? Read Sookie. Enough of the historical fiction. Whose [sic] telling you to read that??"

I thank you for your concern. It has been a surreal few months, but I finished my first draft of my book and am letting her sit for a little while and rest. She and I will meet again soon, I'm sure.

Meanwhile, I hope to have more time to read this summer, whether on porches or in hammocks, in cars or by soccer fields ("Go team!"). Please forgive me while I catch up on the reading requests... you have not been forgotten. In fact, this has been such a positive experience that I plan to expand it and make it even more interactive next year... but you will have to wait for that.

16. THE ISLAND UNDER THE SEA - Isabel Allende

2010-04-20T14:46:00.005-06:00

Published first in Spanish, this book's English release was pushed back after the earthquake in Haiti. However, now is the perfect time to read about the beginning of the Haitian culture with its mix of freedom and oppression. Seeing the poverty during the telethons did not share its historical grace and pride: this was the first country to be recognized as a free black union during a time when Marie Antoinette and her prince lost their heads during the revolution. What an amazing historical time to write about.

However, the state of "French" life in Haiti, known as Saint-Domingue, was quite different in the late 1790s. Life revolved around the sugar and rum plantations. You were a white planter or businessman, a mulatto soldier or madame, or a black slave. According to Allende, at one point, there were only about 30,000 free souls compared to half a million slaves on the small island.

All of this is background to the story of Tete, who is sold to Toulouse Valmorain as a maid to his wife. Later, Tete becomes the backbone of the inner workings of the plantation, and Valmorain relies on her as he would a mistress.

But Tete's heart does not beat hard for her master; instead, she falls for one of the revolutionaries. In typical Allende style, all of the intertwinings of plot bob and weave until a somewhat predictable ending. This time, however, I was not convinced, as I had been when I read Daughter of Fortune. This time, I thought the ending was rushed, and many of the the braids loosened.

Still, for a spring/summer read, this is a fascinating look at history in both Haiti and New Orleans, where many of the refugees relocated after the revolution. I always love a brainy, sexy read.

3.75 out of 5.0 Island Martinis.

15. THE CREATION OF EVE - Lynn Cullen

2010-04-15T12:18:00.001-06:00

Sofonisba Anguissola was one of Michelangelo's only female students during his lifetime. While this novel provides the fictional stories of this time of "Sofi"'s life, it should not underestimate the amazing skill and talent of a female artist during the Renaissance.

This book is why I adore historical fiction.

Sofi must flee Rome and the tutorials of Michelangelo after falling in love with one of the male students. She becomes the drawing instructor for Elisabeth de Valois, the French queen of Spain's King Felipe II. He holds almost all of the power in Europe at this time, yet even he cannot impregnate his young bride.

Soon, Sofi becomes the queen's favorite, and she is drawn into both silly and dangerous adventures. The king's power is demonstrated when it appears that his knowledge of plants, and their properties to kill, assist in the murder of his mistress's husband.

Between fear of the king and the Inquisition, Sofi tries to remain silent and protective of her queen. However, can she save her from her fate? And, can Sofi find the part of herself that can paint again?

It is a truly wonderful story, and the author's explanations for her translation of events in the last chapter made me keel over with admiration.

4.0 out of 5.0 Parson's Passions.

14. THE LUNATIC, THE LOVER, AND THE POET - Myrlin A. Hermes

2010-04-13T12:06:00.002-06:00

Into metafiction? Have I found a book for you.

Horatio casts Hamlet, a student at Wittenberg University, in a play for the wealthy merchant Baron de Maricourt. Soon, the baron's wife, Lady Adriane, becomes entangled in the affair, and not long after the arrival of a certain Will Shake-spear further complicates matters in the play and in love affairs.

Some of the Shakespearean references may fly completely over the reader's head; in fact, some of the references make it difficult to understand the novel unless you know your Shakespeare upside-down and sideways.

But, if you like this, and you like metafiction, and you like threeways and a bit of unique writing, give it a go. Though not my cuppa, it might fill you to the brim.

XX. THE GINGER MAN - J.P. Donleavy

2010-03-26T17:44:00.003-06:00

I was fascinated in this book and its recommendation because The Ginger Man was banned from the United States in the 1950s. My greatest dream is to write a banned book; of course, I had to read this.

However, after twenty pages, it was rather easy to figure out why it was banned. After forty pages, I lost interest in the story, though I would like to revisit it in the future... especially if enough people tell me I *must*.

13. WENCH - Dolen Perkins-Valdez

2010-03-26T17:07:00.004-06:00

My father-in-law has a saying; when asked how he is doing, he replies, "I'm white, I'm male, I was born in the United States at the ideal time, and I am educated."

The women of Wench would answer a bit differently. As the mistresses of southern slave owners, they are brought to an Ohio resort during the mid 1850s that caters to men who can "love" them more openly. Under the ruse of a personal slave who washes, cooks, cleans, sweeps, and cares for the man, each woman has a different personal relationship with her master. While some, like Sweet, have borne several children and feel love for her man, others, like Mawu, despises her master and begins the talk that changes their lives.

Ohio was free territory, but until Mawu began talking of being a "free black," like the hotel's servants, none of the others considered other options for their lives or their children's lives. Their choices would eventually reunite them or divide them forever from their families.

The most powerful part of the novel was the characterization in its short 300 pages. Four women with different beliefs and relationships psychologically stand together with the strength of Stonehenge. A shift of the hip or a glance tells much more than an entire page.

Like The Help, this is a peek at a world I would never know or understand. How are you doing today, Kristin? I am white, I'm a strong woman, I was born in the United States at the ideal time, and I am educated. I am a lucky, lucky woman.

4.25 out of 5.0 Code Limons.

12. DAUGHTER OF FORTUNE - Isabel Allende

2010-03-18T23:22:00.003-06:00

I think I found a new favorite author. And, dear readers, if you recommended this book, step forth into my circle of adoration.

Beginning in Chile, a newborn baby is found at the back door of a moderately wealthy family. Rose insists on adopting the child into the family, and Eliza Sommers life begins. As a child, she is split between the "how to be a lady" lessons from Rose and the cooking and healing recipes of her nana, a native Chilean Indian.

As she grows up, she falls in love with Joaquin. Rose disapproves of the match, but Eliza is so secretive and sneaky that she is never caught with the young man. However, the gold fever of 1848-49 California reaches the coast of Chile, and Joaquin catches the illness along with half of the world. Of course, Eliza follows him, and I will not summarize any more details because you must enjoy this epic work yourselves.

Allende has such an enormous grasp of historical events, places, and people, and she blends them seamlessly into her narrative. A character in one chapter will have significance in a much later chapter, a small image will have tremendous meaning. This is the type of writing that I can embrace.

Small quibble - it's an Oprah book, and y'all know how I feel about that. However, if any of her other books are half as good as this one, I will read them. Suggestions?

4.75 out of 5.0 Picante Lemons.

11. THE BOOK OF LOST THINGS - John Connolly

2010-03-01T19:35:00.003-07:00

David's mother is dying, but he counts the numbers of steps and ritualizes his mornings in an attempt to keep her alive. After her death, and his father's subsequent remarriage, he finds new rituals: books. Especially, listening to the books who talk to him.

This fantasy-filled novel, set in World War II Britain, promises to prompt memories of Grimm fairy tales and ideas of "truth" versus "story." I found that I liked this book much more after I finished it and could begin the rehashing of its meaning.

David finds a hole in the garden, and he hears his mother's voice calling for help. One night, he sees a German plane falling from the sky, and to escape from a fiery death, he crawls through the hole into a fairytale woods. From there, the story follows familiar and strange tales, the stories that we do not tell children, but we probably should. Death comes to those who make idiotic choices, for example, or are not honorable in their actions.

In order to return to the "real world," David must find the king and his "Book of Lost Things." However, is his awakening due to finding a way home, or had this been his imagination all along?

The author threw in enough irony and twists on typical children's fare to keep my attention. More thrilling is the discussions post-reading. Does this other-world exist? As the author states, he has received a unique answer from everyone he has met. A book to make one think - I'll put down my drink for this.

4.0 out of 5.0 Red Witches.

10. THE HISTORIAN - Elizabeth Kostova

2010-02-28T09:56:00.003-07:00

We have our first thrown book of 2010!

A "packet of letters" (please tell me what this brings to mind - an envelope? A folder?) sends a daughter racing after her father, a historian scholar whose life has become entrapped in the tales of Vlad Tepes, or Dracula. Paul has spent his entire life trying to find his missing wife and mentor, fearful that they are part of Dracula's ever-increasing group of minions.

The story is meant to be written in the Victorian style, but this proved to be elusive and annoying. For example, this "packet" of letters proves to take up half of the 600-page novel. The narrator of the letters (Rossi, the missing mentor) and Paul's letters are written in the same voice.

Don't get me started on the ridiculous coincidences. (SPOILER: the mother throws herself off a cliff, leaves a blood stain on a rock, yet manages to survive by rolling onto a grassy portion?! WTFlippin'Hell?!) I truly believe in the suspension of dis/belief in a novel, but this one pushed me past my boundaries.

Door, meet The Historian, traveling at high velocity.

Lucky for you, it is a good basic story, so you will get to see it in theatres within the next four years. I will stay home with a vodka seven and grind my teeth.

1.0 out of 5.0 Vampires.

9. THE MISTS OF AVALON - Marion Zimmer Bradley

2010-02-28T09:44:00.002-07:00

As many of you wonderful Books for Breakfast readers know (because this has been recommended for three years), this book is about the Arthurian legend. However, the twist is the old Celtic/Druid tales, as well as the legend told entirely from the women's point of view.

I have studied the lost Druid training of the "Isle of Mona," and I wonder how much could be truth. Or, is it a form of truth that cannot be proven other than in faith? Either way, I was hypnotized by this epic book. At times, the actions of the characters angered me, but this was the purpose of the novel. Such strangely beautiful writing, as well.

Are the other books in the series (and written with her sister-in-law) comparable? How odd that I felt a sense of loss when I read the epilogue and learned that Marion Zimmer Bradley had died two decades ago. It had been like finding a new friend.

4.5 out of 5.0 Green Mists.

8. THE USED WORLD - Haven Kimmel

2010-02-22T14:35:00.003-07:00

Three women work at "The Used World," and their lives become so intertwined and messy that one cannot help but continue to read.

However, for me, I was frustrated by a number of points in this novel. If you are not afraid of spoilers, see the comments section.

2.5 out of 5.0 June Bugs.

7. THE STONE CARVERS - Jane Urquhart

2010-02-22T14:06:00.003-07:00

With the Winter Olympics held in Toronto, there is an increased interest in all things Canadian. I, of course, turn toward books, and I am fortunate to have a Canadian teacher-friend who has recommended so many great books over the years (thanks, Paul!).

This novel is about the taming of Canadian wilderness. The back story is about her grandfather, who helped build the church in Shoneval. His wood-carving skills created wonder among those who saw his work, and he passed down these lessons and materials to his granddaughter, Klara, and grandson, Tilman.

As adolescents, Klara is typical of the time. She wants to do more than women were "allowed" to do, like carve an enormous statue for the church. Instead, she settles for creating other things as the best tailor in the area. She falls for an Irish farmer who leaves to serve in the war.

Tilman, however, cannot bear to stay home. When he hears the call of the geese, he wants to follow them. This leads to a decades-long separation from his sister. But, when they are reunited, he agrees to go to France with Klara and work on the monument dedicated to the soldiers from the Great World War.

The writing is beautiful and spare, but the characters felt forced into their roles. Klara is bitter and stubborn to the point where I could not comprehend her choices. The end is predictable. If the writing were not so lovely, it would have been painful to read, but I liked the different tales of Canadian history.

2.75 out of 5.0 Canadian Car Bombs.

6. FOLLOW THE RIVER - James Alexander Thom

2010-02-18T22:00:00.001-07:00

The cheesy cover. The almost-romance lift of her skirt. Oh, friend of mine, if I had seen the book when you recommended it, I would never have read it.

However, as this site shows, there are just some bad book covers. Or, it is from a genre writer, so it gets a genre cover. Or, we can blame the 80s. I do it all of the time.

Mary Ingles (not to be confused with Mary Ingalls of Laura Ingalls Wilder fame) is kidnapped by Shawnee Indians after a massacre in her small Virginia settlement. She is nine months pregnant with two sons, but she takes charge of the other prisoners and gets kick-ass respect from her captors.

After plotting her escape, she finally makes a run for it with a Dutch woman, knowing only that she must follow the river to get home to her husband.

Super quick read, fascinating tale that is based on a true story. It made me ask myself, "What if I had to make the same choices?" which is always a sign of a good read in my view.

3.0 out of 5.0 Vodka Chillers.

5. THE FORGOTTEN LEGION - Ben Kane

2010-02-17T20:06:00.003-07:00

As a writer who lives in the world where Romans are enemies and fables become truths, this book spoke to my spirit. Kane has written the first in a series of epic tales about the lost history of the conquered - though definitely not forgotten.

Twins are born to a Roman slave; one becomes a gladiator, while his sister is sold into prostitution. Brennus is the mentor to Romulus, teaching him how to do battle in the arena. When forced to flee, the two join Tarquinius, one of the last Etruscan tribe, who is not only a warrior but a "haruspex," someone who knows the lost arts of divination in the tribe.

The three join the army and fight the Parthians, setting the tone for the future books where they will fight their way to Margiana and become the historically known "Forgotten Legion." Meanwhile, Fabiola, the twin left for death at the whorehouse, is wooed and won by the powerful Brutus. Her fortune also awaits us in the next volume.

While the book may seem like back story for a longer novel, it is full of ancient myths and battles. For example, one greedy general's quest for gold is used to parallel another myth about "beware of what you wish for" (and, strangely enough, appeared in another recent book, as well, but more on that in future posts).

I found myself flipping through the pages like eating potato chips. If kids could read this, history would be ever-so-much-more interesting. However, I don't think I'll feel quite full until I know more about the characters' fates. Please, Mr. Kane, follow the horrible examples of the trilogies turned into six-seven-eight-infinity books, and provide your readers these wonderful stories without dipping into irrational red herrings and plot twists. Diana Gabaldon, I am looking at you.

3.8 out of 5.0 Roman Riots.

January Free Book Contest: PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES

2010-02-16T10:37:00.002-07:00

Congratulations to Renee from St. Louis, Missouri, for having the winning entry for this free book give-away!

Check out the February free book contest at the Facebook page (see link at right) on Friday.

What the - ?

2010-02-16T10:25:00.002-07:00

Between blizzards and writing and work, I have been a poor blogger, indeed. However, I have a stack of books that need to be reviewed, and a new announcement for a free book.

So, forgive the sudden burst of activity as I try to get caught up over the next week or so.

XX? - THE HOUSE OF SEVEN GABLES - Nathaniel Hawthorne

2010-01-26T11:57:00.002-07:00

Am I just not getting it? By the third chapter, I felt like I had spent a weekend at a family reunion, but it wasn't my own family. Strangers converged upon me like ants on spilled soda. Names engulfed my thoughts. A chronic feeling of "What the?" fell over me.

Try, try again? Or pitch across the room (again)?

4. 1776 - David McCullough

2010-01-26T11:46:00.002-07:00

Did I want to revisit 8th grade history class? Didn't I know everything about the Declaration of Independence and Thomas Paine's "Common Sense"?

Obviously not.

And many told me that I did not understand the true meanings behind the words, though I had memorized them to impress my high school government teacher. They were right. Reading 1776 is like quoting the Bible or the Torah, but not knowing the other stories about how Noah tried to make babies with his sons' wives. It is learning that you do not know as much as you think you do.

I have a problem with that, though I will often admit to it.

George Washington, portrayed as a faultless leader, didn't like the New England armies and bemoaned the lackluster performances of his soldiers. It wasn't difficult to agree; many of them turned tail and ran when the Hessians (what? I thought this war was between the United Colonies and England?) approached their battle lines.

Like many books about history, this one is meticulously researched. Unlike many books about history, it is written from the viewpoint of all involved, whether a wife of one of the "rebels," an English ship captain, or the "best friend" of George Washington. One woman, whose husband died during an attack on Fort Washington, took his place at the cannon. These are the stories that we need to share, read, and understand.

4.0 out of 5.0 Washington Martini.

3. OF HUMAN BONDAGE - W. Somerset Maugham

2010-01-16T11:00:00.003-07:00

I owe an apology to the readers of this blog. You have recommended this book for years, and I have ignored your advice. Thank Thor that I have agreed to read according to your whims this year because, if you keep sending me to places like those found in Of Human Bondage, I shall have a delightful year.

This "semi-autobiographical fiction" tome begins with the childhood of Philip Carey, an orphaned, sensitive lad whose clubfoot and reliance on the charity of distant relatives causes every chaff or whistle to feel like sandpaper against his fragile soul.

The reader watches Philip's ventures through life, from a student in Germany to art school in Paris, then back to London for medical school. Throughout it all, his views on love, politics, religion, and beauty meld and waver. It is as if watching yourself repeat high school through an ancient, bubbled window.

However, it is his love/hate relationship with Mildred that causes the most pain and passion in his life. Maeve Binchy, whose writing I adore, wrote it best when she stated that she wanted to send an anonymous letter to this character to warn him of Mildred's evil intentions. This character is the symbol of all: the hope and luster of youth, the despair of broken dreams, and the realization of the self.

Knowing that this book was published in 1915 makes the stories and messages even more astounding. The only subject that is not referred to is homosexuality, which I found surprising considering Maughan was "a raging homosexual," according to his biography by Ted Morgan. But to think of others reading about premarital sex, prostitution, strippers, or atheism must have been shocking at the time.

Perhaps because I could identify with his journey in religious thought or his ability to find beauty in the most common of situations (the charm of an impoverished couple who were delighted that he - a "gentleman" - shared dinner with them), I relished every word. Now, I wish there was a sequel. Tell me, dear Philip, what I will experience in the next decades of my life! You have plainly read my thoughts on the past two decades; please tell me more.

4.75 out of 5.0 Pusser's Pain Killers.

Books for Breakfast - Now with prizes and other vodka-laced mayhem

2010-01-06T11:41:00.003-07:00

I have too many books.

There is no such thing? Bah, I say. I cannot see above my desk, and my shelves are packed tighter than Kirstie Alley in a bikini.

So, for fun and fabulous prizes, please join the new Facebook Books for Breakfast group:

http://www.facebook.com/groups/edit.php?customize&gid=263460624251#/group.php?gid=263460624251

...or look for Books for Breakfast under group names.

The first freebie will be posted next week, so sign up soon!

2. PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES - Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

2010-01-02T12:33:00.003-07:00

Jane Austen must have rolled over in her grave so many times that she is nothing but dust.

I'll admit that I was ashamed to read this book. As an admirer of Jane Austen, I thought that this book was a cruel attempt to solicit laughs and publication ("now with ultraviolent zombie mayhem!"). However, it was recommended to me by several people, and since that is the 2010 goal, it was first on my list.

Yes, this book follows the original tale, but with many more 21st century twists. For example, at the end in the clever reader's discussion guide, it asks, "Does Mrs. Bennett have any redeeming qualities?" Tee-hee.

So, upon reading this, I found myself split in half:
English Professor: This is horrible! Poor Jane Austen.
Naughty Self: (while laughing out loud) This is how I pictured Mrs. Bennett in my head! "... I am sure my dinners are good enough for her, since she is an unmarried woman of seven-and-twenty, and as such should expect little more than a crust of bread washed down with a cup of loneliness."
English Professor: No one will read Austen now, and my students will quote from this book as if it were the original; however, more students will understand references to Mr. Darcy.
Naughty Self: Another "balls" joke. (more laughing out loud)

I suppose if I have to combine the two reactions, I believe in the "imitation is flattery" argument. If anyone dares touch To Kill a Mockingbird in such a way, I shall have to suffer the seven cuts of shame and use my blade to smite all involved.

2.85 out of 5.0 Zombies.

P.S. Natalie Portman purchased the rights to produce and star in the movie version. And I thought her colon was made of cement.

1. HELEN OF TROY - Margaret George

2010-01-01T08:43:00.004-07:00

Jinx, don't read this until you have finished the book. I want another opinion.

Off topic: Margaret George lives five hours away from me. How do I know this? A friend of a friend told me, and she said that I should talk to Ms. George about researching historical figures for my own novel. A bit late, but very kind, nonetheless.

Though I am not sure if Ms. George would receive me. You see, while I admire her imaginative characters, drawing them from a word on a papyrus or the dried out pages of old parchment, her heroines sound exactly the same from book to book. Whether it is Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, or Mary of Scots, they are commanding, bitter, and bold. While we should expect this from leaders, I was disappointed to read the same character, once again.

However, the details of the Trojan War makes up for it. If you saw the movie, Troy, you know the characters, but the war actually lasted for almost a decade (or seven years, depending on the source). While the thrust of the war effort is to take back Helen, there are other reasons, as well. The Iliad and the Odyssey (another book on my "you should read" list) only tells of the fall of Achilles, I am told. This version shows the slow flush of anger as people are killed for Paris's love of Helen, and its effects on the royal family, as well as the couple.

Overall, I enjoyed reading about this woman who may never have existed, but whose fame has lasted for centuries.

3.75 out of 5.0 T-ROY Green Tea Vodkas.

New Challenge for 2010

2009-12-30T09:12:00.002-07:00

First, do you pronounce it "two thousand ten" or "twenty ten"? Post in comments... this is something that makes me tilt the cup more and say, "O-10!"

2009 was the year where I read whatever I wanted. 2010 is the year where I read whatever others want me to read.

Send me your recommendations, favorites, or new books. I promise to stick to only this list for 2010, and I am aiming for 100 books. This will be quite a feat because I also have to finish my novel or my hair will be dark red forever.

I have kept a list of "you should read"s for a year, but I will continue to add to the list. In contrast to the past, I am including an email address again: booksforbreakfastblog@gmail.com. I miss the crazy comments that anonymous people like to make. Don't worry... I'll share.

~~~~~

Mushy stuff ahead: move on to CeleBitchy or Book Slut if it would provide disturbing images.

Thank you for your support. After watching "Julie and Julia," my dear husband turned to me and said, "Why can't your blog be about something else?" I could (and will) have a year dedicated to reading 365 books (2012), but a movie about it would be horribly boring.

However, I have met some amazing, uber-cool people through this blog. I have talked to radio d.j.s in Greece and Italy and been quizzed about my "true alcoholism" by potential employers. This blog used to receive twelve hits per week, and I knew six of them were my own. Now, I receive 4,000-8,000 per week. Y'all are too quiet! Speak up!

Anyway, I am grateful that you choose to waste your time here.

The Best of 2009 - Books for Breakfast-style

2009-12-23T12:59:00.006-07:00

These are the books that received my highest ratings (listed here in order, with best ratings at the top). I left out any glowing reference to Diana Gabaldon, and if you are a reader of this blog, you know why. Otherwise, search her name.

It is always humbling to rate someone else's work, whether it is a grade or a proposal or a book. Why should anyone listen to me?

Perhaps because I have read books since I was five years old. Perhaps because I am also a writer, so I understand the nuances of characterization and imagery. Or, perhaps it is simply because I have read more than 600 books in my lifetime, so I have an idea of what appeals to other readers.

So, sit down with a cup of cocoa and peppermint schnaaps, and make your reading list for next year:

THE STORY OF EDGAR SAWTELLE ~ David Wroblewski (4.75) - I hate when Oprah is correct.

THE SKY ALWAYS HEARS ME AND THE HILLS DON'T MIND ~ Kirstin Cronn-Mills (4.75) - a powerful new voice in YA writing.

WOLF HALL ~ Hilary Mantel (4.75) - I laughed, I snickered, I loved the bitchy dialogue.

BEND WITH THE KNEES AND OTHER LOVE ADVICE FROM MY FATHER ~ Benjamin Drevlow (4.5) - short stories with long reverberations.

THE GARGOYLE ~ Andrew Davidson (4.5) - still hits me as I think of it, and not many books can resonate for months or years.

OUTLIERS: THE STORY OF SUCCESS ~ Malcolm Gladwell (4.5) - I still think about the messages in this book.

THE HELP ~ Kathryn Stockett (4.3) - recent read, but it is still weighing on my mind.

WELL DESERVED ~ Michael Loyd Gray (4.3) - unexpected beauty in writing about darkness.

DROOD ~ Dan Simmons (4.25) - it's Dan Simmons? And Charles Dickens! Need I write more?

IN THE WAKE OF THE BOATMAN ~ Jonathon Scott Fuqua (4.25) - prose that made me realize I will never be a "literary" writer.

THE CHILDREN'S BOOK ~ A.S. Byatt (4.25) - epic storytelling without the fairy tale ending.

THE LIGHTNING THIEF ~ Rick Riordan (4.25) - "say it's sick writing."

THE WEIGHT OF HEAVEN ~ Thrity Umrigar (4.25) - the weight of reality; if this does not make you grateful, I do not know what will.

THE DEAD FISH MUSEUM ~ Charles D'Ambrosio (4.0) - the new king of one line intros and conclusions, and I am ill with jealousy.

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO ~ Stieg Larsson (4.0) - twisty-turny mystery for a quick read.

JOSEF JAEGAR ~ Jere' M. Fishback (4.0) - thank you to publishers who are finally letting these types of YA stories out into the world.

THE MEMOIRS OF CLEOPATRA ~ Margaret George (4.0) - a luxurious read, especially in a freezing environment.

SOMEDAY THIS PAIN WILL BE USEFUL TO YOU ~ Peter Cameron (4.0) - a copy will go to teens I want to encourage.

*****

What will the goal be for 2010? You shall find out within the week. I promise.

65. THE HELP - Kathryn Stockett

2009-12-23T12:32:00.003-07:00

For the love of Thor, get this book. Read it in your book groups. Discuss it. Ruminate. Journal about it. I finished it days ago and could not write this review because I keep thinking about it.

Set in 1960s Jackson, Mississippi, all of the maids ("colored" or "nigra") wait on white women during their bridge games, parent the family's children, scrub the house, cook the meals, and say, "Yes Ma'am" and count the silver. She will use a separate bathroom, and she cannot eat with the family. If one is fired for backtalk or thievery, the head of Jackson society, Miss Hilly, will ensure that woman will never be employed in that town again.

Miss Skeeter, daughter of a cotton grower and his former-debutante wife, has bigger plans than the diamond on the finger and kids in the nursery. She wants to be a writer. Through her determination, she gets to talk to a New York agent. When told to come up with something no one talks about, Skeeter realizes that the relationship between the maids and their employers is a sharp subject. The problem is that no one wants to talk for fear of what Miss Hilly, one of Skeeter's best friends, will do if she finds out.

Minny and Aibileen are wonderful characters as the first maids to speak of their experiences to Skeeter. However, even with Skeeter's kindness during this racially-wrought period (Kennedy forcing the governor to allow a black student into "Ole Miss," the rise before Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech), I wonder of the irony of her motives. She is using black women to get ahead. I wonder at the author's motives - a white woman writing in black vernacular.

The book made me think and analyze and create opinions. What could be more delicious?

4.3 out of 5.0 So-Co Teas.

64. THE YEAR OF THE FLOOD - Margaret Atwood

2009-12-19T07:31:00.002-07:00

About a third of the way into this book, I thought, "Have I read this?" and flipped it over. "Praise for Oryx and Crake" the back copy exclaimed. I almost stopped reading.

I read Oryx and Crake before I began this blog, but if I had to rate it, I would have given it a 2.25 out of 5.0 Stupidity DNAs.

Atwood, whom I have adored in the past, makes me believe we may be having relationship problems now.

At the end of Oryx/Crake (spoilers), Jimmy the Snowman is left in a tree, the DNA-manipulated perfect species of blue-penis-waving men and big busted women singing happily along the ocean.

The Flood tells how Jimmy got there, though through the eyes of God's Gardeners, a nature-cult that would make PETA look like a Burger King. Living off of organic food grown in their roof gardens, they listen to Adam One and sing a lot of hymns. Personally, the hymns were annoying additions, but a couple held humorous references (like Saint Dian Fossey - who died while studying the silver-backed gorillas). Adam One tells the Gardeners of the Waterless Flood that will cleanse the earth.

However, it is Toby and Ren who are the leaders in this book. Toby had once eaten meat and worked at "A Noo Yoo" spa, while Ren was a stripper/sex servant at a local security-approved brothel. At once point, Toby is Ren's teacher, but it is the very weak connections to Crake and Jimmy that link this book to Atwood's "prequel."

Does the waterless flood occur? Yes, you know this if you read the first book. By the way Atwood ended this novel, we are not finished with her fiendish obsession with the future yet. Expect a sequel in a few years, and people will buy it because it is Margaret Atwood. Not this girl. Some of my favorite authors have fallen in love with their characters to the point where the plot or narrative becomes unbelievable and annoying. While Atwood wants to show the world a unique perspective on where we may exist with DNA testing, gene splicing, and government rule (in this case, being privatized), I wonder if she considers the waste of trees being used to distribute her messages.

1.75 out of 5.0 Gorilla Farts.

"Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come."

2009-12-17T08:32:00.003-07:00

~ Matt Groening

Our ice weasel comes in the form of a ginger-haired, flexible, death-proof squirrel. Of course, the Effin' Ranch has many of these creatures. They create gangs: gray squirrels versus red. There are secret handshakes and everything.

However, one of these death squirrels discovered a way to squeeze into the attic through the corner eave of the roof. He left the gang calling card: a black walnut and pile of poo.

We are not pacifists. The boys (including the largest, oldest one) play Halo. I have been known to scream, "Beat him down!" during one son's football game. Mice caught in the basement get hooted out the door and into the garbage bin. And I will admit that I laughed out loud, frightening our dogs, when I saw Mr. Squirrel try to get in with a pawful of acorns, then fall two stories to the snow below... and run away from our German Shepherd mix, Savvy, who had been waiting with her jaws open.

So, the largest (for another six months), oldest male pounded a slab of wood into the corner, either blocking out our errant ice weasel or sealing it for an Egyptian-style death.

Not to be deterred by a simple wood block, this blasted squirrel is testing the remainder of the roof. His means? A black walnut. He means business. As I try to answer student email or grade papers, I hear the tap-tap-tap of his gang knock, and I freeze. He'll wait, like a perverted stalker, and - tap-tap-tap - knock somewhere on the opposite side of the house. I spin around, surrounded by these knocks and taps and warnings that if I step outside, I will be shanked with a black walnut.

Gray squirrels - good for a replacement if possum is not available. Red squirrels - just let 'em go.

"Dance like it hurts,/ Love like you need money,/ Work when people are watching." - Scott Adams

2009-12-13T20:22:00.002-07:00

Well said.

My annual yearly review is always around my birthday. For you naughty readers (who are not reminded infernally by Facebook), it is in the beginning of November. I think about what I achieved that birth year, as well as what I would like to set as goals in the future.

For once, I rocked my year. I made my goals. In fact, I surpassed them.

Pooh on me, but I am going to keep them private. Still, I felt like giving myself an award (I did) and a lot of recognition (still doing it - obviously). Several pats on the back (and on the arse - why not? it's not sexual harassment if it is yourself and you work at home) later, and I still needed to figure out my next birth year goals.

Shared goal number one: internet-free Sundays. Ahem, by reading the date and timestamp of this entry, you will see how that goal is working out for me.

Shared goal number two: finish the damn book. Seriously, or my hair will remain dark auburn eggplant fire, and I already miss my "natural" dark blond.

Shared goal number three: learn more about Buddhism. I've studied other religions (see past blogs about the Torah and Qur'an experiences), but I am drawn to the ideas of Buddhism. I love saying "namaste" in yoga class (some smartass is going to tell me that is Sanskrit). I like the idea of free-flowing energy. Lotus blossoms smell nice. And saying, "Ohm!" very loudly frightens away raccoons, possums, and errant wild kids.

But I have so many questions, like do I have to become a vegan? Why do some people see Jesus or saints during meditation, while I use the entire time telling myself, "Shut up. Stop it. Quit it. Don't make me pull over and force you to not think."

Can I still have PMS? Do I need to bless the Japanese ladybug beetles that squirt nastiness on me before I squish them? Can I still use sarcasm? How often? What about alcohol? Oh, Buddha, what about alcohol?

I am reading The Heart of the Buddha's Teachings, and I love how Hanh uses poetry to express parts of Buddhism. It is inspiring without being cultish... so far.

~~~~

The best reads of 2009 will be posted in a couple weeks, as well as the official Books for Breakfast reading goal for 2010. I think you will have fun with it.

63. MEDICUS - Ruth Downie

2009-12-10T16:46:00.003-07:00

Based in second century Deva (a town in Britannia, or England), this first book in a series by new author, Ruth Downie, is a fun, quickie read for lovers of early British history (like me) and mysteries (like most of readers).

The new "medicus" for the Roman fort in Deva named Gaius Ruso has lost his father, his wife, and a lot of money in trying to repay debts on his family farm. Now, he is mystified by the loss of two women who were - ahem - "employees" at the local brothel. Although no one in the town seems to care about the dead women, or the questions by Ruso, he continues to examine the case, collecting a slave (accidentally) and a new commanding officer in the process.

Ruso could be a Roman Dr. House without the drug addiction. He is a bit irritable, yet his sarcasm and dry wit create an interesting character. The scenes with the dialogue between Ruso and his friend/competitor/fellow medicus, Valens, have been noted by other reviewers as reminiscent of Trapper John in M.A.S.H. I simply found them charming.

Personally, I will like this book much more than others because it contains information about the dwindling Briton tribes of the time, such as the Brigantes. After writing about these mythical times in ancient Britain, it is reassuring to see familiar names and symbols.

However, many will approve of the mystery, though it is rather predictable. The characters definitely carry the book on their shoulders, and I look forward to reading her future work.

3.0 out of 5.0 Roman Riots.

62. THE MEMOIRS OF CLEOPATRA - Margaret George

2009-12-10T16:30:00.002-07:00

After reading Margaret George's novel about Mary, Queen of Scots, I knew that I wanted to try another one of her historical books. The Memoirs of Cleopatra did not disappoint.

Julius Caesar and Marc Antony are two of ancient Rome's greatest figures, and both became the lovers (and husbands - with a question mark?) of Cleopatra, the Queen of Egypt and the Nile. Most of my prior information about her involved Marc Antony (Shakespeare, the film with Liz Taylor), as well as her infamous death. However, this book is so meticulously researched that every lush, decadent detail about both the queen and her realm pulls the reader into the story.

From her childhood - the rebellion of her sisters to hold the throne over her father - through the many battles against Rome, I thought this was a historical fiction dreamland. The romantic elements involving her loves, Caesar and Antony, brought a warmth to an otherwise formidable figure on the page.

Topping 900 pages, it is a challenge for the most devoted reader. If you like historical novels, though, and especially enjoy learning new information (such cities! what characters and leaders!), you will be engulfed by this book for many wintry nights.

4.0 out of 5.0 Caesars.

61. THE MONSTER OF FLORENCE - Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi

2009-12-06T12:32:00.002-07:00

When Mario Spezi, a young journalist in Florence, took a Sunday shift at the newspaper's crime desk, he had no idea that it would lead to a 40-plus year entanglement with Italy's most notorious serial killer.

When Douglas Preston, a mystery writer, decided to pursue the story with Spezi's help, he had no idea that he and Spezi would soon be the center of the investigation.

This is not a book of fiction, but the analysis of the serial killer Spezi labeled, "The Monster of Florence," the botched investigations following the murders, and the crazy allegations that caused dishonor upon many families and shamed one man enough to kill himself.

While the killer has never been caught, Spezi and Preston give a full account of the modern theories. However, the book's publicity seems to imply that they know who is the killer. I was disappointed to find no allegations in my U.S. copy (probably due to libel laws). Overall, it is an interesting enough read for real-crime lovers. For my personal tastes, I found the study of Italy in these pages much more fascinating.

2.75 out of 5.0 Italian Surfers.

NaNoWriMo - (-30-)

2009-11-21T20:21:00.002-07:00

As a journalism/mass communications student, I learned the story of -30-. It signifies the end of the story. One journalists, upon finding out he had cancer or a brain tumor or looming bankruptcy (the tale changes, depending on the source), wrote his goodbye and - rather than signing it - ended it with -30-.

Most public relations pros and journalists use ### now, but it does not hold the allure of -30-, the story told by the dreamy college professor whose face was lit by an overhead projector as he told the silent class in cool, clipped words. It took years for me to adapt to the ### format. My brain and heart do not adapt as quickly.

NaNoWriMo is being -30-ed. My story there has ended. Under the pressure of an avalanche of words, I cannot focus on my story. Last year, when I had no real sense of my novel, it was a fantastic experience where I could play and smear things on the walls with no sense of reprisal or fear. This year, I know my story. I know my characters... in some cases, better than I know my friends. In pushing for word counts, I found myself creating unlikely scenarios for these characters, and the waste of it made me sick to my stomach.

So, I tried to shock my system in another manner. My greatest vanity (highly encouraged by my husband and sons) is my long, blondish hair. It hits the back of my shoulder blades, perfect for a child to stroke or my man to grab and pull me down for a kiss. My youngest would play barber and brush my hair, but even then he would not pretend to cut it.

I colored it red... dark auburn cherry fire red. The color of my heroine's hair, the color that let her be known to her soldiers during battle.

Because, after all, I am fighting a battle of my own. I am writing the novel, after playing with its sister-screenplay for almost eight years. Typing instead of swinging swords, the clatter of keys instead of the clang of metal. But I am going to finish it, and my beloved Celtic queen will finally be released from our strange, intimate bond.

NaNoWriMo - Day 10

2009-11-10T10:05:00.003-07:00

I am struggling. I have never written such crappity crap in my life, just for the sake of writing it. While I like the forced march of writing, I wonder if I will be able to use any of this in the final draft, and that is a depressing and debilitating thought. 50,000 words by November 30, and I have had none of the promised responses, like a renewed idea of the plot or a twist in the characters' stories. Still, discouraged > failure.

As you may have noticed, Photobucket gave me the boot because I did not log in for a year. I get my access back if I join their premium program. Pshaw! As if! Insert your own 80s phrase here.

So, I will be remodeling the blog - but not until December. NaNoWriMo, work, and family take precedence over my silly little blog. Still, I welcomed my 10,000th independent visitor last week (thank you whomever checked in from the Netherlands), so I will continue to read and post my boozy thoughts for other crazy bibliophiles in search of a friend.

60. REBECCA - Daphne du Maurier

2009-11-10T09:47:00.002-07:00

No, it is not a "new novel." In fact, many of this blog's readers have recommended Rebecca for years. I've followed your advice because you have seldom been wrong.

Until now. Or not?

I am sorry dear blog readers, but I had such a difficult time with the plot of this novel. The writing was extraordinary - her use of language incredible. Descriptions danced off the pages and into my imagination. Allowing the main character to stay nameless throughout the book could be considered an amazing literary accomplishment for the times (and by a woman! you can hear the critics of old gush).

But I think I needed more backstory - the things she told Maxim about her past but never revealed to the reader. Then, I would understand her desire to stay.

For those who have not read this book (I thought I was the last one, but you never know), Rebecca is the dead wife of the narrator's new husband. Her presence seems to haunt the huge house of Manderley and distract the husband, Maxim, from his new wife. Mrs. Danvers, a nasty old servant of the house, is so dedicated to her former employer that she and the others insist that certain things (menus, the placement of flowers) be like Rebecca would want.

What kicked this over to the plus side was Daphne du Maurier's post script in my paperback version. She didn't give the narrator a name because she could not come up with one. Love it!

3.? out of 5.0 Boat Drinks.

59. WOLF HALL - Hilary Mantel

2009-11-05T18:46:00.002-07:00

Winner of the coveted Man Booker award for fiction in 2009, Wolf Hall charmed and challenged this reader.

First, I will admit some bias. As readers of my blog know, I have been exploring the books about European royalty, including several volumes about Henry V alone. This book shows the relationship between Henry and Anne Boleyn, yet it is through the eyes of dark merchant/lawyer Thomas Cromwell.

If you know enough about British history (or, Thor forbid, you read Phillippa Gregory novels as truth), you already know these characters. Otherwise, it would be a confusing read. Still, these are not the characters that I have known through different pages. Thomas More is older and fierce in his religious beliefs, while Anne Boleyn is both automaton and vengeful bitch.

What was brilliant about this book, however, was the dry humor. Whether at home, in court (meaning the court of royalty), or back alleys, I re-read bits of dialogue over and over to fully enjoy the snark veiled by manners and questions.

4.75 out of 5.0 English Highballs.

58. THE CHILDREN'S BOOK - A.S. Byatt

2009-10-24T19:24:00.002-06:00

Nominated for the 2009 Man Booker prize for fiction, The Children's Book is written for fans of epic drama; in this case, the Wellwood family and its friends during the years 1890-WWI.

Philip Warren, a runaway found by Olive Wellwood's son in the South Kensington Museum, states that he, "[...]wants to make..." Looking at pages of his drawings, Olive assumes he wants to make pots, and he is sent to apprentice with a famed friend. However, it is Philip who is the steadying character in this novel.

The Wellwoods are enchanting with a lovely English home called Todefright in the country and loads of children to fill it. Olive writes children's stories, while continuing to write a personal story for each of her own children. Humphrey, the father, works in banking and trashes it in his publications under a pseudonym. They host ravishing parties and invite the most radical of their circle.

However, not all is as misty and magical as it seems. Daughter Dorothy and son Tom worry about their parents' fights. Their cousins worry about boarding school or the lack of education for females. The younger Wellwood children are simply mothered by their aunt Violet.

As children do, they grow up and expand into lives that even creative Olive could not have predicted. In fact, this was the most satisfying part of the book - the first 120 pages were devoted to knowing the huge background of players. The ending left many threads hanging loose from the tapestry, which I appreciated.

I almost gave up on this book. It was difficult to plow through the names, the characterizations, the histories. Once the fairytale gave way to the truth, I became fascinated. It was ugly and raw, but the polite English way of dealing with pain made me wonder at how they survived loss or disappointment. Especially Olive, with her proper endings to each story.

Why did this novel not win the Man Booker? Perhaps because of the beginning. The writing could easily bore some readers who are not interested in the nuances of the characters' actions or dialogue. It could have been too long. Still, I think it became a finalist for these same reasons. It is a novel that I will think about for a while, and that is always considered valuable in my experience.

4.25 out of 5.0 Milk Punch.

2009 - NaNoWriMo

2009-10-20T17:17:00.004-06:00

Yes, it is that time of year when people put on silly hats and beg for chocolate. No, not Halloween, silly... NaNoWriMo! National Novel Writing Month - every November, insane idiots from strange places like Mississippi and New Yawk City join this online group and try to write a novel in one month.

I meant to do it last year and the year before. There is never the "right" time to write. It is a matter of getting your butt in the chair and doing it.

So, I am doing it under the sassy nom de plume: KDRockstar. Friend me. I am lonely. And my avatar on NaNoWriMo has zero friend placings as well (*ching* - rimshot - and, thank you, tip your waitresses, I'll be here all weekend).

Click here to join the insanity.

57. AN ECHO IN THE BONE - Diana Gabaldon

2009-10-13T18:42:00.004-06:00

In a word: disappointing.

The background of the series - Claire goes back in time to 1700s Scotland, meets and marries Jamie Fraser, yet must go back to her own time because she is already married to Frank.

For Gabaldon fans, anything more would be "spoilers," so for the full review, see the comments section.

2.0 out of 5.0 Bonesetters.

56. ONE SECOND AFTER - William R. Forstchen

2009-10-08T10:17:00.002-06:00

Anyone want nightmares? It is the time of year when people search out ghosts and goblins and witches. Whether it is for All Hallow's Eve, Samhain, or Halloween, nothing will scare you more than this book.

This novel is about the year after three EMF nuclear bombs are set off above the United States - EMF meaning electro-magnetic frequency. All electronics are affected, including newer cars and water pumps. There are no ways to get medicines or travel, except by foot.

John, a history professor and former Looey, is forced by his conscience to help his small North Carolina community. The choices are brutal, and the results are realistic. Even John does not come out of this situation unscathed.

My gripes: there is a definite agenda to this book. The foreward is by Newt Gingrich, and the conclusion is by a doctor who talks about how this is being ignored by current and past administration. The writing is achingly poor... at times, I had no idea who was speaking because of the strange dialogue format. When I read about Hurricane Katrina - well, let's just say I laughed out loud because of the author's politics being inserted into the story.

Still, it is a quick read and will make you have freaky nightmares. And if this happens, don't even think about coming out here. My ranch is already booked for doomsday scenarios.

2.5 out of 5.0 Red Deaths.

55. MARY QUEEN OF SCOTLAND AND THE ISLES - Margaret George

2009-10-06T09:51:00.002-06:00

Before I get to the review, let me just whinge (I learned how to pronounce this properly last week) a bit. I miss reading. I miss it desperately. Lately, however, I have had to choose between reading and writing. I want to publish in the next decade, so I choose writing. Reading is like taking a hot shower after doing grungy farm work all day. And I am bitter-sad.

So, when I have an eight hundred pager, I expect it to be amazing. The first two-thirds of MARY were great - fast-paced plot, excellent characters, interesting historical elements. Mary, Queen of Scotland and the Isles, is portrayed as a woman who tried her best but was led astray by shifty advisers and loves. However, the last part, when Mary was exiled, needed a strong editorial hand. Slash, cut, burn. Red ink everywhere. There is only so much that one can write about someone in prison. Although the author stuck to the facts, since this was presented as fiction, there needed to be action rather than inaction (off to another prison, brought my sewing).

Still, I am fascinated by the history of the Scots, so if anyone knows of a good book about King James, I would be grateful. If you pick this one up (or use it as a doorstop), skip through the exiled portion. You can thank me later.

3.5 out of 5.0 Queen of Scots.

P.S. Seriously, I am going to try this drink tonight... love it!

54. DRAGONFLY IN AMBER - Diana Gabaldon

2009-09-25T08:40:00.002-06:00

This novel is the second in the "Outlander" series about Jamie and Claire Fraser. While I would not say that Diana Gabaldon is the most notorious or gifted writer of our times, I will say that she knows how to capture her audience with fantastic plotting and historical information.

Though it starts out a bit slow (we do not join old Scotland until the eightieth page or so), the rest of the book will appeal to those who loved the romance, time travel, and Bonnie Prince Charlie aspects of the first book. This time, the fighting is about to occur, and Claire and Jamie are trying to stop the civil wars from beginning.

I love the Scottish history, I adore the characters, and I wept at the "true end" (not the conclusion - readers will know what I mean and I do not want to give away too much). However, toward the conclusion, the strange plotting began, and this is what made the next three books a trifle frustrating for me.

Still, I am looking forward to the release of "Echo in the Bone" next week. Jamie and Claire are not doomed lovers but life partners, and I will stick with them until the end.

4.0 out of 5.0 Dirty Scotsmen.

53. SILVERSTEIN AND ME - Marv Gold

2009-09-25T08:25:00.002-06:00

Based on Marv Gold's lifelong friendship with Shel Silverstein, this memoir gives a glimpse of the mysterious man who lived a juxtaposition. He created art for Playboy and published children's poems. He wrote incredible songs ("Boy Named Sue") but did not have the voice to sing. He barely gave interviews, and when he did, he turned the questions back to the reporter.

Do I feel like I know the man more now? Not really, though the book does have some interesting stories. However, I wonder if they are meant to enlarge the myth of Silverstein or simply remember that even his closest friends did not really know him.

With its quick narrative style, you can read this in a few hours at most. Because I never felt that I received substantial answers, it was more of a disappointment than an intriguing peek at a famous man whose children's poems will forever be stamped in my mind.

2.0 out of 5.0 Miami Beaches.

52. THE SPANISH BOW - Andromeda Romano Lax

2009-09-16T14:20:00.002-06:00

Feliu was almost born Feliz, which means "happy" in Spanish. After the birth, he lay still and silent, so they began to fill out his death certificate. Due to a slight spelling error, his name was changed.

This signifies the theme of the novel: a slight change can have divining ripples throughout the rest of someone's life. For example, after his father's death, he received a bow without horsehair, too big for a violin, but how else could it be used? As a small child in rural Catalonia during the turn of the twentieth century, Feliu knew nothing about music until, by chance, he meets the famed pianist, Al-Cerraz. Through one note, Feliu is set upon a lifetime of learning the cello, a lifetime that includes historical appearances by King Alfonso and Queen Ena, as well as Picasso.

The author, a practiced cellist in her own right, pours her love for the instrument into this novel. As for the historical aspects, there are some tidbits that are stretched to fit the narrative. This never broke the spell for me of this fascinating world of music and artistry... at least, until the final chapter. Rather than continue with the wavering lines of fate, there is a loud splash of a giant rock thrown into the pool.

While the ending disappointed me, I still find myself reflecting on the other aspects of the novel and appreciate the dedication to historical aspects. When one can enjoy a piece of literature and learn from it, I believe it is worth a look.

3.75 out of 5.0 Spanish Super-Charged Coffees.

2009 Man Booker Short List

2009-09-08T07:34:00.001-06:00

The Children's Book by A S Byatt (Random House, Chatto and Windus)

Summertime by J M Coetzee (Random House, Harvill Secker)

The Quickening Maze by Adam Fould (Random House, Jonathan Cape)

Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel (HarperCollins, Fourth Estate)

The Glass Room by Simon Mawer (Little, Brown)

The Little Stranger by Sarah Waters (Little, Brown, Virago)

I'm giddy... any recommendations? Predictions? I've always liked Sarah Waters and J.M. Coetzee, but I need to get these in my sticky little hands ASAP.

51. FLYING CHANGES - Sara Gruen

2009-09-07T20:24:00.002-06:00

I sorta-kinda liked Water for Elephants and half-remembered that it was historical in nature and literary in style. Mm, no. I should use the search option on my own blog more often.

Flying Changes is the second book in a series (I guess of only two because she's moved on to writing about apes) about Annemarie Zimmer, an almost-40-year-old woman with a pAin in the A daughter and iffy boyfriend. Still, she has her horses. She has wonderful memories of Harry, the horse that tripped and fell during competition, putting Annemarie in a coma and Harry to the great farm in the sky.

As I read, I thought, "This woman is annoying." She is neurotic and obsessive and strange. A-ha, but I didn't know about the first book, so I missed a lot of references.

Still, this was not a journey I wanted to take for pleasure. I have my own teen to yell at me, I have my own experiences with horses that need to go or be put down. Many of you may like this as a quickie read, but I never felt the satisfaction of escape. That is why I read and write. Otherwise, it is like the "stay-cation" of the mind.

1.75 out of 5.0 Bay Horses.

50. MADAME BOVARY - Gustave Flaubert

2009-09-05T17:05:00.003-06:00

I have spent more time considering the name play of the title character than the literary merits of this novel. Did he mean that she was "bovine" or a cow? Also, do publishers read the book before printing the cover? Seriously, it took me five Google pages to find a non-blonde Emma.

Sigh. I suppose I should review this book for those of you who care. Perhaps you skimmed the Cliff's Notes (kids, these were paper versions of items like Spark Notes) or skipped to the end. Whiny, spoiled Emma Bovary has a series of lovers. She kills herself at the end. Oops, sorry to spoil it. Um, spoiler? Is it too late?

Yes, I understand the historical importance of this book - Flaubert was sued after portions were released in serial form. In fact, he dedicates the book to his lawyer. I must have seen too many commercials for Doritos or Bud Light because most of the steamy sex scenes that sent women groping for the smelling salts were lost on me.

And Emma is a spoiled cow. Hmm... I wonder if he planned that.

2.0 out of 5.0 Brown Cows.

"Why do writers write? Because it isn't there." - Thomas Berger

2009-09-01T18:29:00.002-06:00

MH - I promised to remind you when this book was available because my review came out so early.

"The Sky Always Hears Me and the Hills Don't Mind" - from Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

No, it is not written by me.

Yes, I know the author, but I am not the only one raving about this book.

And, as you are quite aware, I have slammed the books of people I know in the past, so just have a Ciroq lemondrop with me and kick back.

(MH does not give me her email... she is like Batman.)

This is Kristin. She hates wearing a watch and loves lighting candles.

2009-08-24T22:03:00.002-06:00

I did a search on my blog but could not find an answer... who recommended the movie, Amelie? I watched it tonight and absolutely adored it. She is my new girl-crush. Such beautiful dark eyes and swingy hair with a dimple in her cheek. The screenplay is tight with pitch-perfect dialogue. I remembered the "follow the blue arrow" scene, but I do not remember where I saw it.

Someone gets a cocktail on me...

49. THE CALLIGRAPHER'S DAUGHTER - Eugenia Kim

2009-08-23T19:16:00.003-06:00

Writing this review makes me heartsick because it is not often that I read a novel where I can see how it could have been a masterpiece. Perhaps I've been dipping into my Ciroq stores a bit more, or perhaps this book was marketed to the wrong audience. Either way, this coulda-shoulda been an amazing novel about Korean history that turned, instead, into a novel about Christ and the love of Jesus.

Stop. Right. There.

First, we have a novel/book and it is the Bible. There are also several other novels about God, Christianity, and the Ten Commandments. There is an entire romance line for Christian women. I have read the Bible, the Koran, and other religious texts, including numerous novels that attempt to recreate moments from Biblical history. I am not going to suffer through a ton of hate-posts. Period.

But, if a book is marketed and released as a historical novel spanning the time when Japan occupied Korea in a series of battles and spars, then I would like to read about it. A portion of the book shows the young heroine, Najin (based on the author's mother) in the palace with one of the princesses before the last emperor of Korea is murdered. That is historical fiction.

However, there are few pages without a link to Christianity. While I understand that Korea was one of the few Eastern countries open to the idea of a new religion, during this time it was still considered new and strange, and households often used a mixture of Christianity and Confucian proverbs, casting "devils" out using both religions. If this had been relayed more true to history, the religious aspect would not have been an issue for me.

With advanced reviews, I seem to be in the minority, but after page 286, I winced while reading. She coulda been a contendah. Amen.

1.0 out of 5.0 Godfathers.

48. THE GIRL WHO PLAYED WITH FIRE - Stieg Larsson

2009-08-21T21:50:00.004-06:00

~ English translation by Reg Keeland who was kind enough to post to this blog with the first review.

By now, you have probably heard of Stieg Larsson, a Swedish businessman/journalist who dropped off three manuscripts with his publisher. He died of a massive coronary before seeing the first novel, "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo" was published. This is the second book of a three (four?) part series, and it is my personal belief that you must start from the beginning with the first book to follow along.

Part of the reason why I loved the first book was its "murderer in one room" or "Clue" aspect. It also introduced fascinating characters. The second book continues with Salander, but she and Blomkvist are no longer together. In fact, she does not want to have anything to do with him. However, she soon needs his assistance when she is declared the only suspect in a triple-murder.

What a relief to finally learn about Salander's background, which was only toyed with in the first novel. Now, we understand her reasoning, though it is often based on her own moral code. However, this book had such a plethora of new characters that it became frustrating for me to keep track. After much flipping back and forth, I would hope to rely on written clues, but I was disappointed several times.

Perhaps most frustrating of all is the obvious plug for the next book. The ending is jumbled, needing the quick, clean proficiency of Salander and Blomkvist - together - to fix everything.

Reg... I think this book's translation is much more efficient and precise... well done!

2.75 out of 5.0 Snowballs.

Book Blogger Appreciation Week

2009-08-21T16:31:00.003-06:00

Thank you to whomever nominated me for this - we shall have to wait and decide what to wear to the party. I will bring the Ciroq. No, really, I promise this time.

47. THE NAMESAKE - Jhumpa Lahiri

2009-08-16T12:39:00.002-06:00

Ashoke and Ashima are Indian immigrants in America, trying to balance the life that they left with the life they now lead (with Christmas decorations and trips to the school). The main character is Gogol, their son, who had to be named before being allowed out of the hospital after his birth. Their custom is to have a family name and a "good" name. Gogol's name becomes both, which begins the novel with the tension of something never being completed or perfect - simply in between.

Eventually, Gogol changes his name to Nikolai, believing it easier to live as an American, yet never truly feeling as if he fits in. Later, his father tells him the reason he was named Gogol, which only increases the feeling of alienation and solitude.

As the reader follows Gogol throughout his life - a paragraph that covers a year, twenty pages to cover a date - it is apparent that this story is not really about Gogol at all. It is about finding a way to bring two lives together, two cultures closer, and/or two understandings amended. It is about finding the medium that makes one, if not happy, at least content.

With such depth in the first half of the book, I expected the same from the rest, but the author leaves it to the reader's imagination. I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about this novel, but I did appreciate the extensive depth of detail.

3.5 out of 5.0 Russian Bears.

46. POPE JOAN - Donna Woolfolk Cross

2009-08-11T12:00:00.003-06:00

Ah, the legends and "what ifs" of a female pope was exactly what I needed to clear my head of work (both teaching and writing).

Many have heard of Pope Joan, also known as Pope John Anglicus, whose two-year reign in the ninth century has virtually disappeared from modern history. In this account, Joan, a wicked-smahrt lass is discouraged from studies. When her brother is killed during a Viking attack, she chops off her hair, dons the clothes, and becomes "John."

Her quick wit and mastery of logic bring her notice, as does her ability to heal others with herbal remedies. After Pope Gregory is healed by John/Joan, the path to greater power is revealed.

The author combined some of the legends to create her own ending, but in the afterword she discusses her meticulous research. Even for doubters, this is an interesting historical read. Of course, the essence of romance is thrown in to stir the pot a bit more, but I think the rest of the stew is tasty enough without it.

3.75 out of 5.0 Sneaky Cassies.

45. WELL DESERVED - Michael Loyd Gray

2009-08-02T11:57:00.001-06:00

Argus, a small town in Illinois, is the home of four substantial characters whose lives are intertwined in this driven novel. I often find myself putting books into one group or another: character-driven or plot-driven. This book is an intriguing mix of both.

Jesse, the small-time pot dealer, meets Raul, the just-off-the-docks Vietnam vet, both of whom are being watched by the new chief of police, Art, and the cashier at the market, Nicole. Yet this is not a novel as simplistic as that sentence. Each character is lovingly shaped through dialogue, other character's thoughts, and internal drives. With the strokes of immaculate detail, it is difficult to resist being pulled into their lives.

Personally, I liked this section: "But California really wasn't a place for Midwesterners. Not for very long, at least. Californians expected things to always be easy. Midwesterners knew what it meant to struggle and work for something. [...] One had all the weather and no sense, and the other was more grounded in reality and understood the changing weather to be just part of life's challenges." I am a product of both California and the Midwest, so this tickled me.

Gray's use of specific symbols and imagery create a postcard of small town America, one that pulls the reader through the pages with both smiles and a bitten lip.

4.3 out of 5.0 Sex on the Grasses.

44. OUTLANDER - Diana Gabaldon

2009-08-02T11:26:00.003-06:00

I had the pleasure of meeting Diana Gabaldon twice during intimate lunches with other writers, and she is so passionate about her characters. In particular, she adores her hero, Jamie Fraser, and said (on both occasions) that she could never imagine any actor to portray him.

Recently, a screenwriter friend said that OUTLANDER, the first of an enormously popular series involving time travel, Scottish and American history, and a love comparable to the adult version of Bella and Edward (of TWILIGHT fame), was (finally) going to be made into a film. I remembered Diana's statements, so I re-read the book while vacationing to try to imagine who on earth could play Jamie Fraser.

If you are a romance reader, I need not review this novel. You read it more than a decade ago. You know that the latest addition is coming out next month. But for the rest of you, imagine a WWII nurse named Claire who is reunited with her husband, Frank, a historian/professor who has meticulously traced his heritage through the Scottish highlands. A chance visit to a rock circle during Beltane and she is transported a bit over 200 years into the past, where she gets to meet these famous relations who are rather more dark than "black sheep." Enter Jamie Fraser, dreamy red-headed romantic Scot, and you have a historical novel with a heap of good lovin'.

The next book is the "end" of the saga, so for those of you who have followed the series as I have, who do you think is the Scot that Frank meets on the street in this first book? I am interested in seeing how she wraps this up.

4.25 out of 5.0 Scotch Coolers.

2009 Man Booker Longlist announced

2009-07-28T09:10:00.000-06:00

Byatt, AS The Children's Book Random House - Chatto and Windus

Coetzee, J M Summertime Random House - Harvill Secker

Foulds, Adam The Quickening Maze Random House - Jonathan Cape

Hall, Sarah How to paint a dead man Faber and Faber

Harvey, Samantha The Wilderness Random House - Jonathan Cape

Lever, James Me Cheeta HarperCollins - Fourth Estate

Mantel, Hilary Wolf Hall HarperCollins - Fourth Estate

Mawer, Simon The Glass Room Little, Brown

O'Loughlin, Ed Not Untrue & Not Unkind Penguin - Ireland

Scudamore, James Heliopolis Random House - Harvill Secker

Toibin, Colm Brooklyn Penguin - Viking

Trevor, William Love and Summer Penguin - Viking

Waters, Sarah The Little Stranger Little, Brown - Virago

Where to begin? Anyone have recommendations?

43. TEARS IN THE DARKNESS: THE STORY OF THE BATAAN DEATH MARCH AND ITS AFTERMATH - Michael and Elizabeth M. Norman

2009-07-25T13:14:00.005-06:00

As a child, my grandfather would read the newspaper and say things like, "Those damn Japs, trying to take over ." I knew that was not the right thing to say, and I would look at my sister with big eyes until one of us would break out into giggles. My grandmother would tell us that he had fought in the war and tell him to hush that talk.

Twenty-some years later, I think I understand why he held such long-standing hatred of the Japanese. This book details the atrocities of American prisoners-of-war, and it is so emotionally choking that I had to read it in spurts.

In 1942, American and Filipino soldiers fought for months against the Japanese over a sliver of land called the Bataan peninsula. Ben Steele of the United States Air Force became adept with his rifle, as did many others (cooks, machinists, pilots), but the battle ended with the surrender of 76,000. This is the largest defeat in American military history.

The book mixes biography with heart-wrenching journalism. As we follow Ben Steele's fight for survival - first, the Bataan death march, which was a 66-mile horror; next, the series of POW camps - readers are also told of the struggles of other people, as told through diaries, interviews, and painstaking research.

While Germany is often the "bad guy" of WWII and Japan is considered guilty of Pearl Harbor, this shows another detailed history of the war. It should not be missed by anyone. The beautiful, poignant writing and organization of the material only adds to the powerful tone of the book.

4.75 out of 5.0 Teas.

42. FINGER LICKIN' FIFTEEN - Janet Evanovich

2009-07-24T15:19:00.002-06:00

Janet, girl, we need to chat.

I adore Stephanie Plum and Ranger and the rest of the crazy characters in your books. I remember the first time I picked up Three to Get Deadly, and I had to go back to read the first two of the series immediately. Loved the tone, loved the Jersey hair, loved the sassy sex scenes.

Obviously, others like it, too, or you wouldn't be on the fifteenth book (not including the holiday episodes). But 300 pages (hardcover) with triple spacing and two and a half inch margins? Are you one of my former composition students?

I'm a tad bummed, Janet. Even for a vacation book, this made me sad. It is a novella. It is getting silly instead of clever. And I hate that I still found it amusing. So, I am going to stay clear for a while - perhaps read Tolstoy - and just read your next book in private while still at the bookstore. I am sure that I will finish it there.

2.5 out of 5.0 Barn Doors.

“80 percent of success is showing up.” - Woody Allen

2009-07-24T15:10:00.003-06:00

Wow, I received an award from Katie at 101 Books in 1001 Days. In the spirit of giving, I will pass it on to my first reader: Bibliolatry's blog. Her reviews are always funny and spirited, and I think that she will take over the world of online book reviewing within the next five years. Or, she will not have any more books to read. Either/or.

Thanks again, Katie!

Books for Lunch, as well...

2009-07-13T18:45:00.002-06:00

As I am reading TEARS IN THE DARKNESS: THE STORY OF THE BATAAN DEATH MARCH AND ITS AFTERMATH, I think about all of the atrocities of American soldiers and how little I have read about them (other than during the Vietnam War). I want to read about that.

Then, I started thinking about how quiet it has been since I stopped checking my email account and moved to Facebook. Where are the book recommendations? What has made your summer or changed your year? What is your all-time favorite book that you cannot believe I have overlooked?

41. JOSEF JAEGER - Jere' M. Fishback

2009-07-10T20:53:00.002-06:00

As I read more YA books, I wonder, "Where were you when I was a teen - and stuck with Gone With the Wind?"

JOSEF JAEGER is no exception. Based on Hitler's Germany, Josef is a 13-year-old who lives with his uncle after his mother's death. His uncle, Ernst Roehm, is the openly gay chief of the Nazi brown shirts. Through his personal experiences, Josef realizes that he is gay, as well.

After Josef is chosen to play the lead in a propaganda film, he finally feels safe. He loves his work, he loves a Jewish boy, and he loves his life in Berlin. However, he hears rumors that his mother's death was not natural, so he does what he can to find out the truth.

I knew I would like this book due to the historical elements, but I did not expect to enjoy it as much as I did. Rather than using a heavy hand with the stories that we have all read - the deaths, the extermination of Jews, the Nazi power - the author uses Josef as a metaphor for the German people. He is a teenager who is trying to find himself during a time when politics truly meant life or death.

My only gripe was that Josef is portrayed as a 13-year-old. Since I live with one, I felt that some of the experiences would have been more believable in a 15- or 16-year-old. While I kept in mind the cultural and time differences, I still have difficulties. Even the cover drawing looks like a much older boy.

Outside of this, the writing is clean and concise. There are beautiful passages of imagery, like jagged snow peaks "looking like monstrous teeth biting into brilliant sky." Fishback's use of language is poetic at points, like a master brushing paint on a canvas. For the author's sake, I hope this book gets banned because then it will receive the attention it deserves.

4.0 out of 5.0 Summer Beers.

40. NATURE GIRL - Carl Hiaasen

2009-07-08T10:59:00.002-06:00

I love me some Carl Hiaasen. He has perfected the quirky characters, strange yet predictable plotting, and hilarious flashbacks to the point where I wonder if he even thinks about it when he writes. I know that I hardly think at all when I read what he writes, which is the whole point. Lovely escapism with a few laughs.

In this case, Honey is furious at a telemarketer, so she scams him into coming for an eco-trip in Florida with his mistress. Of course, the plot is much more complicated, but the general point is that she is out to screw over Boyd.

After reading so many of his books, I think I could give a doctoral thesis oral exam about his writing style, thematic purposes, and use of sex for laughs. Since a Ph.D. in Literature is not in my immediate future, I will simply say that he has written another good vacation book. Not my favorite of his, but good enough.

2.75 out of 5.0 Key Lime Martinis.

39. LITTLE CHILDREN - Tom Perrotta

2009-07-08T10:50:00.004-06:00

I adore the film, ELECTION. It's probably the last time that I have liked Matthew Broderick's work. Still, the book is even more incredible, which is why I chose to read this rather than watch a lovely, sweaty Kate Winslet in the role.

Stay at home parents are akin to propaganda-spewing Nazis. I can say that because I was one for several years. Every parent has starch-stiff beliefs (no TV as a babysitter! home school! flashcards! no violent toys!). This book takes a group of parents, mostly stay at home mothers and fathers, and allows them to bump along, similar to that video game, "The Sims."

Perrotta is both empathetic and cruel in his characterizations, but he is always funny. After closing the book, I was thankful to be out of those mind-numbing years, though I do miss the naps.

3.0 out of 5.0 Sour Patch Bombs.